Cav's Place

Ten years ago, I was wondering if the Hubble Space Telescope would still be operational in five more years, for its 30th anniversary, so it’s a pleasant surprise to see it still “alive” even today, on its 35th. And at least it seems that even the current dreadful budget proposals would maintain normal operations for it and Webb… But they’d bafflingly pull the plug on Roman, which would be the next one in the “family”. And let’s not even get to the planned Habitable Worlds Observatory, which would be supposed to follow in a future that’s ever less likely to predict, probably in the early 2040s, and rely on the technology and findings of Roman.
Not that such dismantling of any state operations, or more exactly of the useful ones in particular, isn’t exactly in line with that terrible and terrifying administration’s general policies, or with those dealing with science or even space exploration in particular, but when Roman is basically already built and ready to launch, ahead of schedule and, if so, apparently for less than the planned cost, scrapping it would mean throwing away something you just built and poured billions into just before it’d actually be put to use, just before all of that effort and all of those expenses would yield results. I’m not going to ask whether they’re really that malicious or stupid, because the answer at least for the first part is very obviously yes, but it just beggars belief.
But, just like ten years ago, this is basically just a brief post, a very small way to honor Hubble and all those who imagined, designed, constructed, maintained and made, and continue to make, proper use of it, to celebrate and give thanks to these efforts that inspired and popularized science and space exploration, added so much to our knowledge and understanding of the universe while at the same time revealing just how much more we still have to learn, reminded us how small and fragile the only home we’ve ever known is and how important it is to treasure and care for it, and also inspired us to keep looking up, no matter how much we keep stumbling…

I’ll start by saying that I did stick to the plan mentioned in the previous personal post in terms of what I took for the cold, but also found that dad had likely brought it from my mother, since she was here and when, as soon as she walked in, I said that I wanted to stay away from her and maybe wear a mask, to avoid passing it to her, she said that I shouldn’t worry about that, because she’s been fighting a worse one, probably caught from the hospital, for over two weeks, and her other ailments leave few treatment options. On the other hand, I’ll also mention that I couldn’t follow the dinner schedule at all those days, washing some pots and then eating dinner between 3:20 AM and 3:50 AM in the early hours of April 13, and between 3:40 AM and 4:15 AM the following night, after some time spent having a look with dad at his new laptop, and that morning I also got in bed at 5:25 AM, after checking a dish that dad had left in the fridge for too long and taking out what seemed to be going bad at the top. And I only caught five hours of sleep that morning, before the upstairs neighbor started drilling and I decided to get up and get some things done even if the drilling soon stopped, meaning to get more sleep in the evening… But I only napped for just about one hour then, staying up to watch a match after waking up, munching on some nicer bagels during the last half an hour or so of it, and then wasting over one hour and a half by getting back in bed late in the evening but being unable to get back to sleep. And after getting up that numbness and weakness returned, albeit more normally, mainly in the right leg, and there was also a strange feeling at the back of my head. And I ate dinner between 3:50 AM and 4:35 AM, with peanut butter on all of the bread, and got in bed at 5:20 AM.
I got up after the alarm rang, at 2 PM, though I had been mostly awake for roughly an hour or so at that point, after my parents got up and started getting ready to leave. Either way, I had decided to take some better pills that day, starting to do that after having the usual stuff, with the sweet thing consisting of a slice of cozonac, with added honey. And I eventually left a couple of minutes after 5 PM, wearing the full running gear, sticking to that t-shirt from the half marathon of 2016 but returning to the old running shoes and also having some things in the pocket of my tights. The reported temperature was about 14°C and it should have held steady, though I couldn’t actually check after the run.
The time was 1:19:21, with sector times of 4:29, 5:11, 6:07, 4:39, 5:13, 6:02, 4:38, 5:17, 6:10, 4:45, 5:22, 6:05, 4:27, 5:10 and 5:46, making for lap times of 15:47, 15:54, 16:05, 16:12 and 15:23. So, yes, I changed what has for so long been the usual running plan before a race, deciding that it’s pointless to still run only ten kilometers and going for 16, but the first sector was a serious reason for concern and sector three of lap one and the lap as a whole made me think that I was looking at 1:22, and I was even more convinced of that when merely staying under 16 minutes on lap two as well meant pushing on its third sector. Since I still had something of a cold, that wouldn’t have necessarily been terrible in itself, but it was definitely disappointing, so when lap three made it seem that I might actually have a chance to squeeze under 1:21, I clung on to that, pushing on sector three of lap four in order to make sure that I’ll manage that even if I’ll end up approaching 17 minutes on lap five. However, when I saw that, with no more than 16:01 on that fifth lap, I could even squeeze under 1:20, I wondered whether I had that in me and really went for it, possibly realizing that I had done so too early and letting myself regain my breath a little on sector two but then really giving everything on the last sector, which actually led to that lap being my least slow lap in two months. Of course, that means that I haven’t had as much as a single normal lap in that long, the target lap time for ten-kilometer runs being no more than 15:20, but managing that on lap five, and also getting even under 1:19:30 as a result, did offer me some hope.
I noticed what was going to be the main problem right after the first turn, some sprinklers leaking quite a lot of water which had formed a large puddle, the only way around it being to go off the path in a spot where that could be a little tricky if I wasn’t careful, so on the first lap I lost up to a few seconds to find a spot where the puddle was very shallow and jump over most of it, with just one foot placed in that spot, and on lap four I ended up hopping in that same manner because a few other people were going around the path in that spot when I got there, though at least at that point I knew just where to step, so I lost a little less time. But on lap two I worked out how to go off the path while losing as little time as possible and on laps three and five I managed to do that even better. But that was pretty much it in terms of notable issues, the amount of weaving and going the long way around being pretty normal otherwise, and while I hesitated a number of times, mostly because of kids on various wheeled vehicles, I wouldn’t call any of those moments significant. And the wind which I did feel early on mostly made it feel a little chilly, especially since the sky was also overcast, without really making me feel that I had to fight it, and later it died down anyway. As for physical issues, on sector two of lap three I started getting some warnings, the right knee being the most notable, as usual, but other parts of that leg and my left calf joined in as well, yet those warnings never got any worse. And while at the start of lap four I felt like I hadn’t left everything in the toilet, that feeling faded in time, though I had some gas that I occasionally released, and it is possible that other people heard that once or twice, one of them possibly even making a comment behind me.

After the run, I went to Penny Titan, but I didn’t find what I was looking for there either, so I just bought some expiring meat for dad. And then, since I had dad’s metro card, I went to the metro station and took the metro for two stops, though that probably didn’t really make any difference in terms of time and very little in terms of how much I had to walk to the Penny that’s next to Auchan, where I put that meat in a cabinet and then just retrieved it, since I still didn’t find what I was looking for or even a price label showing where it should have been, and that’s a location where it doesn’t say that they have a reduced number of products, so it seemed ever more likely that it had just been listed in the catalog but was never actually available in stores. Either way, I then continued to Auchan, entering with that meat and buying a few things before checking yet another Penny location on the way back to Titan, once again putting my things in a cabinet and then just retrieving them. And after walking out of there I started jogging, because it was getting late but also because it was chilly and I was just wearing the running clothes. And the fact that I ended up walking back to Titan after taking the metro from there just proved that I shouldn’t have bothered with the metro the first time around either. Then again, seeing as there’s an Auchan at Obor as well, everything after checking Penny Titan was a waste of time and I should have instead rushed back to change, or at least grab my jacket, and then go straight to Obor… But I couldn’t have known that at the time, of course.
Either way, I took the metro to Obor, the fact that I just missed one when I switched at Dristor and then had to wait some seven or eight minutes making me quite anxious, but after jogging to that mall and putting my things in a cabinet, I entered Carrefour a few minutes after 9:30 PM and found that they hadn’t even finished making the bakery discounts… But I also saw that only the pastries and a few baguettes were still being bagged and discounted by 50%, the bread that was left not having any discount, so I fear that the days of being able to buy bread with a good discount are completely over and I expect that to soon be the case for other bakery products as well. But that evening I found two apple pastries and took them, and as I was looking through what was available a guy noticed how I was dressed and asked how much I run a marathon in and we had a brief chat about running. Either way, I then also grabbed an expiring high-protein pudding that was actually discounted by 75%, and when I went back to the bakery area to put back the pumpkin pies which I had also grabbed at first, I spotted Remus Cernea there and greeted him, ending up having a brief chat with him as well.
After retrieving what I had in the cabinet, I decided to risk jogging to that Kaufland, even though it had no Easter schedule listed when I had checked the site before leaving, unlike other locations that were listed as closing at 11 PM, and if it did close at 10 PM it’d have been hard to get to another location in time. But it was just about 10 PM when I got there and saw with relief that it did close at 11 PM as well, so I put my things in a cabinet, peed and washed my hands, dashing to the women’s for soap, and just got some expiring germinated wheat, even if the price was still higher than what I’d have normally wanted to pay, a handful of onions, at full price, and some kashkaval for mother that was among the expiring products. Then I wandered around until it was past 10:45 PM, but there were no new or increased discounts, and that wasted time led to needing to use a regular checkout, since all of the self-checkouts accepting cash were closed when I got there, and that also meant that I used the physical store card, since I couldn’t get myself to ask the cashier to enter the code for dad’s digital one from that slip of paper. But at least I did take the time to dig out that voucher received for recyclables which I had been left with, so I could also use that when I paid. And then I retrieved my things, arranged everything, and walked out just before the announcement stating that the store was going to close in five minutes, taking the metro back. And I kept jogging, so I just grabbed a recyclable with the deposit symbol after entering the building, stepping back outside to empty it.
I got back at 11:20 PM, then talked to dad for a while, put the purchases in their place, ate what was still good out of a spoiling banana and one of the apple pastries, did the day’s squats, and it was a few minutes before 1 AM when I went to wash, being done just before 1:50 AM. Then I washed what was in the kitchen, ate lunch, on and off, between 2:55 AM and 4:05 AM and dinner between 4:20 AM and 5 AM, and got in bed at 6:20 AM. And, despite thinking that I was going to pay for wandering around all that time, right after a run, wearing just the running clothes, the following day I decided to take a break from any medicine, only still taking the regular vitamin C and zinc. On the other hand, that afternoon I finished The Dark Eye: Chains of Satinav.

On April 17, neighbors once again woke me up with drilling, but I did want to go out pretty early anyway, so I left at about 2:45 or 2:50 PM, after doing the day’s squats and taking vitamin C and zinc and one other supplement, though it’s possible that some of the powder part of that one spilled when the top fell out when I tried to push it in, as it should be done in order to mix the components. Either way, I had filled two bags with dad’s recyclables with the deposit symbol and if the third only held the few I had gotten back with two days earlier when I walked out, I ended up filling that one as well, picking up quite a number on the way, and a woman also handed me one when I passed by her.
Well, the machine from Carrefour said that it had no container available when I tried to use it, and the only empty cabinets were locked, probably stuck like that, so I went back out of that mall and put everything in at Kaufland, splitting on two vouchers, though several of the plastic bottles required a lot of tries. Then I washed my hands and got some expiring products from there, after beeping dad and asking him about them when he called back. The QR code on one of the discount labels was too faded, but I had taken two of those products, so I just scanned the other one twice at the self-checkout, using the voucher with the lower value when I paid and then cashing in the other one. And then I went back to Carrefour, entering with the purchases in the backpack and just getting a mini bread from the discounted products, though the price was half of the already discounted price that it had those days and I should have probably bought all three that were there, especially if there really won’t be evening discounts for actual bread anywhere anymore. Either way, a young woman left a few coins next to me as I was adding it in the backpack and, after staring after her for a moment and wondering whether I had forgotten my change, I realized that I hadn’t, but took them anyway, meaning to add half of the value, along with half of what I received for the recyclable handed to me by that other woman, to what I meant to give away… Eventually…
Either way, I then continued to Obor, just grabbing two more recyclables with the deposit symbol on the way, putting them in the machine from that Kaufland, entering with the backpack and just buying a deeply discounted spoiling carambola, which I’m pretty sure I had never eaten before, also using the voucher received for those recyclables, then adding it in the backpack and continuing to Carrefour. But I spotted a new pet store in that mall and right at the entrance they had the cat food that was discounted at Auchan for marginally less, so I bought a bag from there, then put my things in a cabinet and wasted a fair amount of time in Carrefour, searching a fair bit without even being able to find where what I was looking for should have been, only finally finding the spot after asking an employee and searching the general area that she vaguely pointed me to more thoroughly. But only the price label was there, the spot being empty, and I didn’t find anything else to get either, so I retrieved my things and went back to Kaufland, picking up another recyclable with the deposit symbol but putting it along with everything else in a cabinet, washing my hands and getting that product from there instead, since they had actually matched Carrefour’s great discount for it, though it was listed with a lower one in their catalog, and they still had some. And I also got two expiring breads for my parents, then retrieved and arranged my things and continued to Auchan, entering with everything… And being unable to find the high-protein yogurt that was on sale there, and when I asked an employee she basically told me to look through the entire dairy area, which I had thoroughly searched already, so I just put that recyclable in the machine, bought some paper towels for dad, also using that voucher, arranged my things once again, walked out of that shopping center at 8:15 PM, and grabbed plenty of other recyclables with the deposit symbol on the way back.
I was here at 9 PM, quickly dropped everything off, grabbed the money and rushed to pay the maintenance bill, then put the purchases in their place, drank some tea, peed, changed the jacket, and left again a little after 9:35 PM, with those gathered recyclables with the deposit symbol, and I picked up one more on the way to the other Kaufland, where I found a cart with the coin in it and connected it to others and took the coin. There was another one there, but it was smaller and couldn’t be connected to the regular ones, and I had no idea where others like it would be, so I left that one there and put the recyclables in the machine, also taking two from there which weren’t accepted and putting them in a cabinet before washing my hands, entering the store when it was close to 10:15 PM, and taking two lettuces that had a great evening discount. And after dad texted me at one point I beeped him and when he called back I asked whether he wanted some cucumbers that were at half price, even if they were from Turkey, getting as many as he told me to, and then taking a few other things that also had evening discounts, including a handful of onions that had a lower one but which nevertheless meant that I shouldn’t have gotten those at full price two days earlier, not that I could have known that at the time. Either way, I then grabbed one more expiring product and measured something for my chair, having taken measuring tape with me, and was just getting in line at the self-checkouts when the closing announcement came.
Well, things got somewhat uncomfortable shortly after that, since the people who were using one machine had a whole lot of products and the man was angry that he wasn’t being helped. It was only moments later, just when the next machine had freed and I could start using it, that he loudly cursed the employees, claiming that he had been waiting for half an hour and kept being ignored and also complaining that he had to do their job because the regular checkouts were closed, so I muttered that they definitely won’t be helping him if he talked like that and that, yes, at that hour you do have to use the self-checkouts, which led to him making a comment about me as well… And it’s also possible that he sent his kid to pick my pocket, since I felt something and saw that kid rushing away from me when I looked, but all I had there was that measuring tape, which was definitely still there, so I shrugged it off. On the other hand, I’d say that the employees did notice that I had taken their side, so while the one who was normally working in that area went to help that angry family, two others who seemed to just be there to make some purchases borrowed her card and logged on to clear the errors that I had, the machine first stating that I had removed a product from the scales even though I hadn’t and then that the onions were not the correct product, even though I even rushed to weigh them again at the scales from that area and the listed weight was exactly the same. Either way, I then also used the voucher received for the recyclables… And when I was done that family was once again arguing with the employee, that time because they had put away their receipt and couldn’t open the gate, so I casually smiled at them and held up mine, handing it to that employee when she offered to help, so she scanned it and then handed it back to me and I rushed to leave after those people.
I was actually a little worried, since the man was still angrily badmouthing the employees while walking away and then they stopped after walking out, right in front of the doors, and I felt that it was already too late and couldn’t stay inside and take the time to arrange everything after retrieving what I had in the cabinet, waiting to see whether they’ll leave. So I just walked right past them, set my things on a table a short distance away and took the time to arrange everything there, being all too aware of them but making an effort to not even spare them another glance. And they stayed where they were, so if I’d have tried to wait for them to leave it’d have just made things worse, and that way I could walk away without any other problem when I was done, picking up some more recyclables with the deposit symbol on the way back.
I got back close to 11:50 PM, then cleaned the litter box and went to drop a bag of trash down the chute, talked to dad a little, put most of the purchases in their place and spread out the rest, ate an orange, and it was almost 1:10 AM when I went to the bathroom, to use the toilet and wash. I was done just after 2:10 AM, then put the remaining purchases in their place, peeled and boiled carrots and also used the worse lettuce leaves for the salad, took some more of that medicine expired for a year, and ate lunch, with some salty sticks instead of bread, on and off, between 3:40 AM and 4:25 AM, and dinner between 5:15 AM and 5:55 AM. I got in bed at 6:55 AM.

I woke up around 10:10 AM, when dad was getting ready to leave and Liza was in the litter box, and then I thought I hadn’t even gotten back to sleep by the time the drilling started again, though after a few minutes I looked and saw 11:18 AM, so I probably napped a little more. But at that point I got up and thought about going out again, yet I had already given up on that idea by the time the drilling stopped, around 1 PM, and after eating that carambola and the high-protein pudding bought two days earlier and taking the regular vitamin C and zinc, which was all that I still took that day, I got back in bed for a good three and a half hours, managing to sleep for about two of them, before finally reading some more of the book, just over a week after the previous time I had picked it back up. And it was also only that afternoon when I noticed that no visits had been recorded on April 17. And then, after napping for just about one more hour late in the evening, I ate dinner between 3:30 AM and 4:15 AM, with the last several minutes spent gathering what was stuck on the plate.

At least the neighbors let me sleep, so yesterday I went out at 3:45 PM, once again with the recyclables with the deposit symbol and after taking both vitamin C and zinc for the last time, deciding today to just keep taking vitamin C, and even that mainly because I had found some that was expired since 2022 and wanted to get through it. But, to return to yesterday, I decided to try handing in those recyclables at the Profi from Basarabia, where they should take them manually, thinking that those two which hadn’t been accepted should also be taken there, but I was told that their system wasn’t working, so I continued to Carrefour, picking up two more recyclables with the deposit symbol on the way. One of those was a can that was quite crushed, but the machine from there accepted it without problems, along with one of the two which hadn’t been accepted at Kaufland and all of the rest, so I was only left with one and I entered the store with it, taking a sweet pastry and one of those mini breads from the discounted products and beeping dad to ask whether I should also get some expiring bio (organic) kefir for mother and taking two after he called back and told me to. And the self-checkout machine asked me to make sure that I had scanned the correct product after scanning the pastry, but the employee from that area immediately told me to just hit OK before I had even noticed the message. And then I also cashed in that voucher, since the value was higher than the total price of the purchases.
Since Kaufland stores were closing at 6 PM and Carrefour at 7 PM that day, I then continued to Obor, along the way picking up a 0.50 RON coin that I spotted on the street and some more recyclables with the deposit symbol. And when I got to that Kaufland I found two carts with the coins in them, so I connected them to others and retrieved those coins as well before putting the recyclables, with the exception of that one that still wasn’t accepted, into the machine. Then I washed my hands, entered the store, with everything, a little after 5:15 PM, and bought a number of things, including that thing for my chair that I decided to get after all, after spotting a few that were a shade of green in that location. I also beeped dad twice more while I was there, but he didn’t call back, so I went ahead and decided which discounted things to get on my own. And I was waiting in line at the self-checkouts when the closing announcement came, only noticing as I started scanning that one of the breads which I had picked up for my parents from the place where the expiring ones are placed wasn’t actually discounted, so I set it aside and left it there, and then the machine didn’t accept the bundle of patience dock as the correct product and I had to call the employee to override the error. Then I also used the voucher received for the recyclables when I paid and took my time to arrange the purchases before continuing to that Carrefour.
I picked up one more recyclable with the deposit symbol on the way but just put it along with my other things in a cabinet before entering the store, a little before 6:20 PM… And finding the bakery area pretty much completely cleared, with just a few nice breads left on a table, plus a single one of that same kind on one of the shelves, none being discounted. But I saw some interesting expiring kashkaval and bought a piece, then retrieved my things and made my way back, picking up some more recyclables with the deposit symbol on the way, plus one label that also had the symbol, and getting here a little after 7:30 PM, and later doing 200 squats, since I was a day behind.
I’ll also mention that I had sort of considered buying a ticket for today’s handball match, and the site that sells them also sells through some machines, but when I tried to use one from that mall from Obor, after walking out of Carrefour, I couldn’t find the match there, and while searching I found myself looking at a BSOD and then it rebooted but seemed stuck while trying to boot back up, so I walked away and tried another one on the way back, but the match really didn’t seem to be listed, so it’s possible that it’s excluded from what can be purchased from machines for some reason, the only option being to purchase the ticket on-line. And, as I said, I was only sort of considering it, so I readily gave up on the idea.

And now I guess I’ll get around to writing about March 18 as well, starting with the day’s early hours, when I ate dinner between 3:20 AM and 3:50 AM. Then, after getting up, it was 1:30 PM when I left, with the recyclables with the deposit symbol and those other things that I take to Kaufland, grabbing another recyclable with the deposit symbol on the way, putting them in the machine from there, splitting on two vouchers, ending up with a third after finding one more and putting that in as well, and then with a fourth after finding three more before walking in the store and going back to also put those in. Then, after putting those other things in what may be the proper bin, I got a lot of toilet paper… And then, as I was looking for other things, I realized that one of my gloves had fallen out of my pocket, so I retraced my steps and fortunately found it placed on something, so somebody must have noticed it and lifted it off the floor. Either way, I then also took two expiring products that had great discounts and one frozen one, and since there was a general discount for frozen products of that kind but that product also had a regular discount those days, at the self-checkout I first checked whether the discounts stacked, continuing with the other products after seeing that they did, and using all of the vouchers received for the recyclables along with the 10 RON one received on March 7. And then I took quite some time to arrange the purchases, eventually settling on having four packs of toilet paper in the large backpack.
The next destination was Carrefour, but I had meant to check a pharmacy on the way and only realized that I should have used another route in order to do so after reaching the place where the routes meet, so I went back from there… And only wasted time by doing so, since neither of the products that I asked about were available in that location. Either way, after putting the other things in a cabinet that didn’t lock when I reached Carrefour but entering with the large backpack, I got the cat food that I had gone there to get and some expiring beer for dad, beeping him but just deciding to get some when he didn’t call back. Since that cat food generated those vouchers on the receipt, I split it in three at the self-checkout, also adding the beer on the last transaction and needing an employee to clear the sale as a result, though she just did it from the computer. And then I retrieved what I had in the cabinet and arranged everything, dad only calling back after I had already walked out, and on the way back I decided to make a small detour to another location of that pharmacy, finding that the nose spray was available there and buying one.
Considering how badly I needed to pee at that point, the wisest thing would have been to come straight back from there. And then, after deciding to continue to Penny instead, the next wisest thing would have been to use the toilet from the pizza place that’s next to it before entering the store. But I did neither, putting the other purchases and the recyclable with the deposit symbol which I had picked up on the way in a cabinet and entering the store with that large backpack… And then I didn’t even hurry, but quite the opposite, taking the time to look through the spices and the eggs that were on sale, getting some spices and replacing two eggs that seemed cracked in one carton with some from another of the same kind, even if they expired a week sooner, after being unable to find another one with the same expiration date that wasn’t really banged up, getting something else for dad as well, and calculating the total carefully. Admittedly, I had to put so much effort into holding it in that I doubt I could have hurried, and even thinking was difficult, and the outcome was probably pretty much sealed by the time I ducked behind a pillar and loosened my belt, so saying that I had an emergency and asking whether there was a toilet that I could use, since I assume that there must be some for employees, which I did consider doing, would have likely just attracted attention, and just leaving everything there and dashing out, especially when I saw how long the lines were, would have likely meant being unable to get back and make the purchases, but I did neither of those anyway, instead just focusing on my breathing and posture while waiting in that line and then dashing straight to the toilet from that pizza place as soon as I was finally checked out, knowing that there was no way to make it back here.
Well, I made it to the toilet and it was fortunately unoccupied, but the moment I got in front of the urinal I guess that my body got the signal that it could finally relax and, well, it did just that, first with a trickle and then, as I was desperately trying to unbutton my pants, letting go completely, so most of it came out before I managed to get my cock out of my underwear, which left me wondering what the fuck to do, especially since I had also left those other purchases in the cabinet from Penny. One option was to get back here like that, change, and then go back for them, but after taking off the soaked underwear and then having to also pick my phone and some coins off the bathroom floor, since they fell out of the pockets of my pants as I looked over them, I put my pants back on, put the underwear in a bag, and decided to go for a bluff, trying to act as if nothing happened, attempting to hide the wet part of my pants to some extent with a bag but otherwise just walking straight back, retrieving my things from the cabinet, and even taking some time to arrange the purchases, albeit crouching while doing so. And, while I still tried to hold the bags in a way that covered the wet area to some extent, I did my best to act as if nothing was wrong on the way back as well.
It was 6 PM when I got back, with 16.5 kg, and then I washed below the waist, put the purchases that had to be placed in the fridge or freezer in their place, did the day’s squats, and changed my underwear, pants and socks, the problem being that I had just taken those pants that day and the other pair, as well as the socks that I ended up putting on, were in the laundry basket, both having been worn when I planted trees. Either way, I then also washed what was in the kitchen, ate lunch, cleaned the litter box, and left again a few minutes after 8:30 PM, with that remaining recyclable with the deposit symbol and a bag of trash which I dropped down the chute.
I jogged to Kaufland Basarabia, but still picked up two recyclables with the deposit symbol on the way, putting them and that other one in the machine from there and picking up two Pepsi bottles that those who had been ahead of me had left there after they were rejected multiple times. And I couldn’t make the machine accept them either, so I put them and the gloves in a cabinet, washed my hands, and entered the store at 9:05 PM, seeing that there were no more evening discounts for bakery products in that location either. But I did make use of evening discounts to get a lettuce with root and some germinated wheat, even if those discounts weren’t as high as I’d have liked, and I also got some expiring meat for dad, plus a few onions at full price, also using the voucher received for the recyclables at the self-checkout. And then I arranged the purchases a little, went to the toilet, to avoid taking any more risks, retrieved what I had in the cabinet, and managed to walk out just as the guard was locking the doors, the closing announcement coming just after I stepped outside. And then, after making a few more attempts to get the machine to accept one of those Pepsi bottles but still failing, I picked up a few more recyclables with the deposit symbol and also checked that Mega Image on the way back, putting everything in a cabinet and getting some salad that was discounted by 90%, though there’s no way to really know what’s in those boxes where they mix whatever’s left on the bottom of the trays at that hour. But at least they don’t also charge for the plastic boxes, or at least it didn’t happen the few times I bought such things, and that evening I also gave the cashier the exact amount listed on the label. And then I retrieved what I had in the cabinet and made my way back.
I was back for good a couple of minutes after 11 PM, then put the purchases in their place, ate an orange and a packaged croissant that was expired for a month, washed what was in the kitchen, and went to the bathroom, to use the toilet and wash, a little after 1 AM. I was done a little before 1:50 AM, and then dad cleaned and separated that meat while I started cleaning after him, but after also finding a way to stuff it in the freezer it was almost 3:30 AM when I finished cleaning the mess he had made. And, while that salad from Mega Image would have been enough on its own, after doing my best to wash it a little and microwaving it for a couple of minutes, I also added an onion and some of the worse lettuce leaves, selecting and washing those taking some more time, resulting in too much salad, and leading to eating dinner between 4:50 AM and 5:25 AM. And I got in bed at 6:35 AM.

The fact that the news about possible evidence of life being detected on K2-18 b was taken up by mainstream media may offer a much-needed boost for space exploration in general, at least in terms of public awareness, especially now when NASA’s budget joins those of so many other important US agencies on the chopping block, but I wouldn’t exactly get excited over it on its own. Yes, maybe someday, in that increasingly unlikely distant future scenario where we won’t only still exist as a civilization but also thrive and develop enough to reach other star systems and actually find life on them, and possibly even confirm this particular detection, if life is indeed the source of those compounds, the moment will be marked in the history books. But at the moment I see it as mainly a technical matter, a test of what substances current technology may allow us to detect, if used at its very limits, without inferring much from any such detections, and even without really caring about what may, in theory, be inferred.
The thing is that, if life, at least in its simplest forms, is actually common in the universe, we still have a pretty good chance of finding it elsewhere in our solar system, if only we’d actually look. There is also the possibility of finding traces of past life on worlds that are currently completely lifeless, the obvious first option being Mars, but despite the proximity, the existing missions and the chances of actually sending researchers there in a relatively foreseeable future, that actually seems more difficult than finding actual life on the major moons of Jupiter or Saturn. So I for one will hold off any excitement until that happens. Or, of course, until we’ll find signs of technology, of an actual civilization elsewhere in the galaxy, or in the universe in general… But that may well be reason for fear as well…

Another unconditional basic income study just published its results, which were entirely unsurprising and in line with what’s been known for at least several decades, but you wouldn’t think that if you saw how it was reflected in the media, which continued to focus on the wrongest aspect anyway. I mean, it has been proven all along that people who take part in such trials will typically continue to work pretty much as before, so to lead with that fact and call it surprising continues to baffle me, but the real problem is that the very concept of an unconditional basic income is supposed to lead the way towards a world where many people would no longer be needed on the “job market” in the first place… Which is where we’ve been for quite some time anyway, at least in the more developed parts of the world, where so many jobs, I’d dare say the large majority, are created just so people will keep having this method of meeting the, also completely artificial, requirement of “earning a living”, seeing as in themselves they aren’t actually necessary, and in fact plenty are actually harmful.
But let’s call that another discussion and move to the other, equally unsurprising, results, this study yet again proving that people who receive such an income see improvements in health, especially when it comes to mental health, feel more satisfied with their lives, especially when it comes to their relationships and personal lives, which they also put greater focus on, have a greater sense of purpose, feel more in control of their lives, are more likely to donate and volunteer, and are also more likely to continue their studies. Even if, once again, all of these things really fall into the “and you needed a study for that?” category, I’d really like to see all of these benefits being highlighted in the articles that cover the topic.
Of course, the entire concept of a basic income still keeps people trapped in this finance-based system, so its time has actually already passed and we should be moving to the direct distribution of resources and goods and access to services, but seeing as such a system would be even better and offer a greater sense of freedom and security while also being much more efficient, the effects of an unconditional basic income provide a baseline, the minimum benefits and improvements that will result from switching to such a system. And it is something that can be implemented pretty much instantly, as a stepping stone, the only requirement being the willingness to do so, simply taking a large part of the money that exist, which are an entirely artificial resource anyway, and distributing them to people while keeping tight controls on inflation, so each would have enough for a decent standard of living in the longer term as well. But, of course, that’d require people, whether those in power or the masses, making some correct choices…

To start right after the previous personal post, on the evening of April 5 I found that the source of the weevils which had been once again appearing in the kitchen was once again something purchased from Penny and of their store brand, but that time it was pasta, which I really didn’t expect! So it seems that there is something in their chain of production that causes that infestation…

But now I’ll get to this week’s run, which was supposed to be a half marathon distance, the second and last one before the race, but the conditions didn’t seem right and, more importantly, I didn’t think that I was in any shape for such a run. Not that I was in any sort of form anyway, but after going out Monday and Tuesday and only getting some four and a half hours of sleep Tuesday morning, I was just crushed, spending two and a half hours, or maybe a little more than that, in bed late in the evening doing little to change that, since I only caught a brief nap that ended when dad had a sneezing fit. And yes, he was coming down with something, so I was definitely worried that I was going to catch it as well, but at that point the immediate concern was the exhaustion, and it seemed like I was going to have a hard time getting back to sleep and the noise dad made while cooking pretty much ensured that I didn’t. It is possible that I drifted off a little more, but if so then it was only briefly and lightly. And then I had things to wash and clean in the kitchen, also moved what was in one of the pots into a large jar that dad was going to take to mother in the morning and what was in the second pot into that emptied first one, which was easier to fit in the fridge and also had a suitable lid available, and finally ate dinner between 3:45 AM and 4:15 AM, with peanut butter on some of the bread.
Yes, that was because, while I was initially thinking to skip this week and run twice on the following one, with the half marathon run on Monday or Tuesday, I ended up deciding to run Wednesday after all, since the conditions definitely wouldn’t have allowed it on Thursday and the forecast for Friday listed more wind, if not slightly lower temperatures as well, plus that Friday was already rather late if I was going to do a half marathon run at the beginning of the following week. So no, at that point I didn’t plan to do that half marathon run that day, but a regular run instead, though I wasn’t sure whether that meant that I was switching them around or that it was going to be an additional run, the plan of two runs on the following week remaining in place, at least if I wasn’t going to catch whatever dad had. And, while until late at night I was thinking that I was definitely only going to run ten kilometers, I eventually started wondering what the point of that was and whether I might just somehow manage 16 km instead, without the time being completely embarrassing, I mean.
At least I slept quite well. I mean, I woke up when dad left, at 6:50 AM, and twice more to pee, but always got back to sleep right away, and while a little after noon the noise made by a neighbor woke me up again and kept me up for a little while, it wasn’t that long until I got back to sleep yet again and when smaller noises woke me up one more time I must have gotten back to sleep so quickly that I’m not even completely certain that I did fully wake up until a few minutes before 2 PM, when I checked the time and, even though I had set the alarm to ring at 2:30 PM, I decided to turn it off and get up… And by that point I had started wondering whether it wouldn’t be possible to actually cover a half marathon distance that day as well, even if with a poor time and still planning to do so again the following week. But it didn’t seem likely, at least not without a time that would be completely demoralizing, so I didn’t try to prepare for it by also adding raisins in dark chocolate in the yogurt or taking one of those expired energy bars or the gel that’s expired for even longer with me, just having the usual stuff, with a slice of cozonac, with added honey, as the sweet thing, and leaving at 4:40 PM, wearing the full running gear, though I returned to the better shoes and also to the t-shirt from the half marathon of 2016. The reported temperature was 11-12°C, holding steady.
Well, the time was 1:45:43, with sector times of 4:18.13, 5:13 (5:12.90), 6:01.53, 4:35, 5:10, 5:57 (I think 5:56.59), 4:37, 5:19, 6:02, 4:41, 5:19, 6:09, 4:42, 5:19, 6:11, 4:42, 5:15, 6:09, 1:53, 6:13 and 1:58, making for lap times of 15:32.56, 15:42 (15:41.44), 15:58, 16:09, 16:12 and 16:06, plus 10:04 for the final portion. So it’s not just that I ended up running a half marathon distance after all, but it was actually a “proper” one, not just to say I did it. It’s still not a useful time, being over 1:45, but it’s the tenth fastest through the park, and 1:40 better than a month ago. And I really just made up my mind to continue as I went along, even the fact that I ended up deciding to memorize the exact times for the first lap after happening to see the hundredths as well after the first sector despite not meaning to look at first showing that at that point I wasn’t completely certain that I won’t end up just running ten kilometers after all. And, while I once again decided to stop looking at the hundredths after that first lap and really don’t know the exact time for sector one of lap two, I’m pretty sure that I remembered them correctly after happening to see them after the following sector, so I’m also pretty sure that the listed exact time for sector three of lap two is correct, the fact that it was the one decent sector three of the day making me actually want to look at that point.
I wasn’t particularly pleased with the first sector’s time, having tried to be pretty fast, but at that point I meant to run 16 km unless my body won’t allow it, so I allowed myself to slow down a little on the next sector. But I’d have still wanted to squeeze under six minutes on sector three of lap one, failing to do so seeming to be a bad sign. However, by then the thought of continuing to a half marathon distance was becoming more than just a passing one, so I tentatively calculated the lap times needed in order to stay under 1:50. And after lap two I also compared the lap times to those from a month earlier, seeing that I was 25 seconds ahead and pretty much deciding to go for it. I still worried that my body won’t allow it, but at that point the target was to avoid losing time compared to a month earlier on lap three as well and remain ahead overall after four laps, though I was certain that I’ll then fall behind. But that target of 1:50 became 1:48 after lap three, and when, after four laps, I kept gaining and was 51 seconds ahead, I started wondering whether I even had a chance to be faster than last month, expecting to lose between 45 seconds and a minute after lap five and therefore aiming to at least preserve that advantage at the end of it… And ending up extending it to 1:08, which didn’t just make me clearly aim to be faster than then, but also hope to get under 1:47. And after two sectors of lap six I realized that I might even have a chance to squeeze under 1:46, so I pushed hard on sector three of lap six, and again when I returned to that part of the route, so on sector two of the final portion, the target at that point becoming to beat the 1:45:50 that I thought, correctly, was the tenth fastest time through the park, which I safely managed despite almost walking up the stairs at the start of the final sector.
My right knee started giving warnings early on and other parts of that leg gradually joined it, but they were never more than warnings, what I found much more concerning being that feeling of numbness in my legs, and in fact in the left one in particular, which is not what I’m used to, so it seemed that I couldn’t quite run as I wanted to and it took me a while to correct that, and the feeling also seemed to largely go away later on. On the other hand, by the end of lap three my hands were already starting to go numb in that way that tends to indicate that I’m nearing my limit, and by the end of sector two of lap six they were really numb, making it hard to press the button on the stopwatch. And at some point after that my left ankle started hurting, though whether that was on sector three of lap six or on sector two of the final portion, I can’t recall. But since I remember being relieved when the feeling passed, it was probably on sector three of lap six, since otherwise there’d have been too little time for it. Either way, it was on sector two of the final portion when my legs also started getting heavy, which led to struggling to go up those stairs as much as I did. And there were also the two times when I stepped in holes that were under the lane, and while the second time, on sector two of lap six, it wasn’t that much of a problem, the first time, on sector one of lap four, my right ankle bothered me a fair bit for a while, though it eventually recovered. And I stepped on something right at the end of lap six and it seemed to have gotten stuck to the bottom of my shoe, at the front, and over the next few minutes I made a few attempts to get rid of it, which might have cost me a little time.
When it comes to the problems caused by people, on sector two of lap one I hesitated because of a kid who was pushing his sibling’s empty stroller and started moving across the lane when I was a few steps away, then did so once again on sector two of lap three, that time because of a kid who was chasing soap bubbles, while on sector two of lap four the reason for the hesitation were some dogs who were proving a little hard for their owners to control. Then there were a few other brief hesitations, one of them on that same sector two of lap four, another at the start of the following sector, and possibly a few more after that as well, though they were minor and I didn’t really remember by the time I finished the run. However, one more notable moment, when I might have even stopped for just an instant, was on sector one of lap six, but the reason is proving harder to remember. I think that it was something small, but whether a dog or a child, or something else entirely, I couldn’t say anymore. But it was definitely a boy on a bicycle who actually caused me to stop for a moment on sector two of the final portion, turning around at some speed and passing in front of the people that I was just about to pass, so we ended up almost running into each other and it’s a good thing that we both managed to stop in time.
Otherwise, the lane was obviously still damaged in all sorts of ways, and large parts of it were also wet, albeit not soggy. As for the weather, it was rather windy at times, though the wind died down in the later part of the run, and while dark clouds were nearby, it was actually mostly sunny, almost completely on the first two laps and most of the time after that, and if later on, from lap six, if not even from its second half, it didn’t seem sunny anymore, that was mainly because the Sun was dropping lower, not because those clouds were moving in.

On the way back, I grabbed two recyclables with the deposit symbol and checked the nearby Mega Image, entering with those recyclables and walking out with them as well, not bothering to use the machine when I had nothing to buy. Then I ate what was still usable out of a spoiling banana that was small to begin with, but that was hardly an issue when after that I got some 950 calories from a bag of peanuts. And then, after changing, albeit leaving the running t-shirt on, it was almost 8:45 PM when I left, with the recyclables with the deposit symbol, two burned out light bulbs, the broken flashlight and dad’s broken headphones, and the plastic and metal, which I meant to drop off in a recycling bin on the way, but some items ended up “hiding” in the bag at that point and then I forgot to drop them off on the way back, so I ended up coming back with those few things. But at least I could put those recyclables in the machine from the nearest Penny, though one that I picked up from there wasn’t accepted, so I entered the store with it and those other things and just got some paper towels for dad, also using that voucher when I paid, but not receiving the receipt because the cashier just crumpled it right away and I didn’t speak up to ask for it.
I then rushed to Kaufland, picking up another recyclable with the deposit symbol on the way and putting it in the machine from there, but that one that wasn’t accepted at Penny and two more identical ones which had been left next to the machine from Kaufland weren’t accepted there either, so after taking the cart which had been left in front of the recycling machines, with the coin still in it, connecting it to others and retrieving the coin, and then dropping off the light bulbs, flashlight and headphones in the proper bins, I put those remaining recyclables and the paper towels in a cabinet and went to wash my hands, just with water, since there was no soap in the men’s and the room for disabled people seemed to be in use at the time.
It was almost 9:40 PM when I entered the store, seeing some evening discounts and picking up a lettuce with root, or more exactly two of them placed in the same bag. And while the discounts for lettuce, of any kind, remained the same, some of the others increased to 90% after 9:45 PM, so at that point I also took two bundles of wild garlic and, out of curiosity, one of patience dock. And then I also checked the chocolate area and took three of those large ones that were three for the price of two those days, wondering if the 30% discount that applied to chocolate those days would stack with that. I seriously doubted it, but I nevertheless tried when I got to the self-checkout, initially only scanning that chocolate and the QR code for dad’s store app, and when I saw that the 30% discount didn’t apply I asked the employee to remove them and moved to another machine, since it was free. And I was using that second machine when the closing announcement came, but I had to call that employee there as well anyway, since it wouldn’t accept that lettuce with root as the correct product, and she took her time before getting back to me. Either way, I also used the voucher received for that recyclable when I paid, then retrieved my things from the cabinet and arranged everything a little, and walked away at 10:10 PM, picking up a few more recyclables with the deposit symbol on the way back.
I got back a little after 10:40 PM, then cleaned the litter box and went to drop a bag of trash down the chute, put the purchases in their place, washed the few things that were in the kitchen, did the day’s squats, ate the apple pastry that I already had, and it was almost 11:55 PM when I went to wash, being done just after 12:40 AM. Then I talked to dad a little, scraped what was left on the sides of the cast iron pot since the last time I had made mamaliga, eventually reaching the limits of what I could do with my fingers and using a spoon, doing my best to be careful but likely causing some more damage to the enamel as a result, and it was 2:10 AM when I started eating lunch, on and off, finishing at 3:15 AM. During that time, I took out almost all of the bread from the freezer, looking for the one piece of walnut bread which hadn’t been dropped that I was sure I still had but not finding it, so I eventually took one of the pieces of the one which I had dropped in the store before putting everything else back, then washed that piece a little more and put it in the oven for a while, which made it taste even nicer but hard to slice. And I also moved some roes into a jar, and finally ate dinner between 4:20 AM and 5:25 AM, with the last several minutes spent gathering what was stuck on the plate. I got in bed at 6:25 AM, my nose feeling quite irritated by then, though it hadn’t been like that earlier…

It was only some three hours later, when dad fed Liza and then left, that I woke up and it didn’t seem like I was going to get back to sleep quickly, so a little after 9:40 AM I got on the computer for a while before finally reading some more of the book, for the first time since March 15. And it was a few minutes before noon when I tried to sleep again, managing to fall asleep after a little while but waking up again at what must have been roughly 2:30 PM, or at least not long after that, since quite some time passed before I checked and saw 2:58 PM. And then I was yet again unable to get back to sleep, even if only some occasional small noises were coming from the neighbors, so even if it was past 4:20 PM when I finally got up, I’m pretty sure that I didn’t get any more sleep in all that time, snapping back awake right away the few times when it seemed like I was about to drift off. And then I finally initialized and partitioned the second NVMe and copied files to it, and at night I rebooted the computer and saw that error about Secure Boot not being enabled again, while on the other hand the other error didn’t return. Otherwise, I ate dinner between 4:25 AM and 4:55 AM, after selecting the parts that were starting to rot from those lettuces with root, removing those bits and washing the rest properly taking a huge amount of time, which I also spent standing. And then I took a pill for the throat, which had started being sore after lunch, which was a clear cause for alarm when dad definitely had something. Then again, that pill was expired for almost two years and I also took it before brushing my teeth instead of just before going to bed, which was at 5:50 AM…

By the time I woke up, some time before noon, I clearly had something, so I dug through the piles of pills in the living room cabinet to find what we had for colds and took some vitamin C and something else for the throat which wasn’t expired before getting back in bed a few minutes after 12:30 PM, at which point I was starting to feel something in my chest as well, and when I woke up again at some point I felt like I even had a fever. At least that feeling had mostly passed by the time I actually got up, close to 5:20 PM, though I had been awake for quite a while by then, but my throat was still sore. Still, I wanted to go out again, so I did the day’s squats and left at 7:35 PM, with the recyclables with the deposit symbol, along with that plastic and metal that was left in the bag and the few more pieces which had gathered… And I still didn’t quite manage to put all of those things in a recycling bin on the way, one thing remaining on the bottom of the bag until I put the recyclables, including one picked up on the way, in the machine from Carrefour, which actually accepted everything, so even those three which hadn’t been accepted before. And that allowed me to spot that remaining item and drop it into a recycling bin from that mall before entering the store, mainly looking for fresh garlic, which was discounted those days, but initially grabbing a discounted sweet pastry. And then, since that garlic’s left with a useless part attached to the head but it’s paid by weight, I took what I had selected to an area that seemed quite clear and removed those useless parts, using the small cutter which I had taken with me for the first and the last one, but managing to tear the rest off by hand, and then I also used the voucher received for the recyclables when I paid.
I then continued to Penny, hoping to find something in that larger location but still being unable to, asking an employee but not even seeing a price label in the area she indicated, and when she was actually there and I told her that, she said that in that case they must not have it anymore. So I just got something for dad, also using the voucher received for the two recyclables with the deposit symbol picked up on the way there and which I had put in the machine. Then I put the purchases in a cabinet at Kaufland, washed my hands, and entered the store at 9:30 PM, ending up just getting a chocolate for myself and two smaller ones for dad, that 30% discount applying to all of them. I might have bought more of those for dad if the employee who was in that area and actually scanning the price label of chocolate bars would have been helpful, but when I asked whether the discount applied to those as well, since there was no sign on that specific section of the shelf, he said that if there is no sign, it doesn’t, yet I still took those two and checked at the self-checkout, finding that it actually did apply but not rushing back to get more at that point. And then, after retrieving my things and just throwing everything in the backpack, I still failed to walk out before closing time, the announcement coming just as I was walking to the exit, which still opened, but the outer doors had just been locked, so I had to use the emergency exit anyway, and then I took out the purchases on one of those tables and arranged them better. And then I spotted three more recyclables with the deposit symbol at the top of the first trash can after I reached the sidewalk, so I went back and put them in the machine, keeping the voucher for another time.
I picked up some more recyclables with the deposit symbol on the way back, and I also entered that Profi, with everything, and got two buns that had the 50% evening discount and which I grabbed with those tongs, since I didn’t see gloves, though I always doubt that those tongs are cleaner than my unwashed hands. Either way, the cashier gave me someone else’s receipt, so I turned around and handed it back to her, being left without the one which should have been mine, then I added those buns in the backpack and also entered that non-stop Mega Image with it, without finding anything to get from there.
I got back at 11:05 PM, put the purchases in their place, ate an orange and the sweet pastry, washed what was in the kitchen, and it was 12:50 AM when I went to wash, being done a little after 1:35 AM. I ate lunch between 2:10 AM and 2:30 AM, took the last of that medicine expired for over a year, ate dinner between 3:55 AM and 4:40 AM, by which time I definitely felt something in my chest as well, took some zinc and another one of those pills for the throat expired for close to two years, and got in bed at 5:55 AM… And when I got up for a while, around 10:30 AM, as dad was getting ready to leave, I had crap to blow and spit, felt rather hot, and the most concerning thing was that it definitely felt like there was something in my chest. And even if otherwise I felt much better, that remained the case when I actually got up for good, at almost 4:20 PM, and I’ve even started coughing. So I’m continuing to take things, so far more vitamin C and zinc and some other pill for the throat, with the plan for the night being to take another medicine that’s very similar to that one expired for over a year and which is expired for “just” one year, and another one of those pills for the throat that’s expired for close to two years, to at least get through them. And this should continue to be the plan for the coming days.

The original plan for this post also included what I skipped from the previous personal one, March 18, but I ended up skipping it once again, especially since I couldn’t even finish writing the rest before midnight, what was originally posted ending even before the end of the first paragraph of the section about Friday, just before entering the store, with the rest being added Monday evening.