- Consumermas » »
- « « Phew!
I Hate Christmas!
Even more so since she left, but I always have and probably always will…
When I was little, Christmas meant an entire mess. I was living with my grandparents and they’d get up early in the morning to prepare, cook things and so on, had me help as well, woke me up early to go to church and so on… Then you had the big family gathering, a big table set and everyone sitting around it, stuffing themselves, talking about generally annoying things and having the record player play things I really didn’t want to listen to. There were the relatives I really didn’t want around me and relatives that I might have wanted to spend some time with but only if I could get them away from the rest, and of course that wasn’t possible since everybody was supposed to sit nicely together around the table… As for presents, they weren’t too interesting…
Then I moved in with my parents after the Revolution, but Christmas still usually meant visiting my grandparents. I was partly getting rid of the turmoil and getting up early in the morning, but still ended up sitting around a table with family and not knowing how to get out of there faster. The record player was getting replaced by the TV, but the fact that it was left on things I didn’t want remained. As for presents, still uninteresting, though as of ’92 I was getting quite specific in what I wanted. That’s when I got my first computer and I mainly wanted games or, later, upgrades. Obviously, those were the things I got the least often…
I only managed to break that “family” pattern around the year 2000, at least as far as grandparents are concerned. There were still gatherings here at my parents’ place, they were still annoying, but at least there were fewer people. There was also still the tree to decorate and the whole “Christmas spirit” idea that pisses me off…
But things were starting to look good and for those of 2003 and 2004 I was living with Andra. It still was a problem because she was really getting into this “Christmas spirit” thing, though without giving it any religious significance, and that was rather annoying. Plus that her family was gathering at her grandparents for lunch that day, I was invited insistently, was refusing equally insistently, and ended up spending the day alone. Spending a day alone was a good thing when the other alternative would have been spending it with my parents, but it became a very bad thing when the other alternative was spending it with her. But at least I was getting the best present possible, simply being with her…
Then, after she left… It became a day like any other, sitting here in my room and feeling like shit. And just like any other holiday, be it legal, personal or religious, it can only get worse the more I’m being reminded that it should be a cause for joy and celebration. I’m sorry, but I’ve forgotten what that is…
But there is one more thing that annoys me about any such gift-giving occasion… Why should you give gifts with certain occasions? Why “must” it be done then?
Well, I neither want to give nor receive presents on such occasions. If you want to give somebody a gift, give it without it being a special occasion. And please ask what they want before getting anything, to avoid getting something they’ll throw in a corner the next second and never look at again.
As for all the marketing schemes around this time of year and the “bombardment” everyone has to withstand, that’s a topic for another post. At least it’s, thankfully, much less intense here in Romania than I hear it is elsewhere…
I heard how it is the the US and UK and yeah, much less…
So why do you need a special time to give? Why do people make profits out of it? And what the heck can you buy somebody you truly care about that’d mean more than taking your pick out of a certain few things money can’t buy? (As for those you don’t truly care about, why give anything at all? It’s just so fake…)
You used the same one :) And no…
December 19, 2007 @ 8:39 PM
Is it less intense? I didn’t expect that!
I don’t hate Christmas! But I’m not as pessimistic as you are. I think most people are not. I hate the fact that I’m not home. I hate the fuss, and I hate all the people that are pushing me when I’m just trying to buy some milk.
But the general idea is mutual giving. Which is not that bad…
I forgot which nick I used last time… Did you get some decent glasses?
December 19, 2007 @ 8:26 PM
Here is ok, as long as I stay away from the stores…
It’s like gifts exchange. It just a habit which you can use it as you like. And is not fake as long as you use the occasion as you feel like. So, some people take advantage, some people expect too much. What do I care!? That’s not my problem.
Thought I did. It’s a stupid nick. And I misspelled it.
I would give you some glasses for Christmas! Or contact lens… not really sure…
December 19, 2007 @ 9:36 PM
And if I don’t feel like using it as any kind of gift exchange? And I don’t want anything for myself now… If you’d have some sort of magic wand and could wave it and ensure she’ll make it through this ok, great, otherwise it doesn’t matter. (No details, not my story to post…)
December 20, 2007 @ 12:15 AM
Yes, you are right. You can always do as you want. You can use everything that surrounds you, and do anything. But you’re just grumpy. You’re not doing anything. You thing people should change their sick Christmas, but you are not changing anything. Your just content for being miserable.
The thing is people wish for something special. They ignore their family the entire year and then they fix it on Christmas Eve. Now you are going to tell that they shouldn’t ignore their family in the first place. But you see, people need a mixture of good and bad in able to appreciate the good.
Example: I am away from home. I can not go visit my home whenever I want due to some obligations. Christmas is when everybody leaves me alone and I can go without explaining why or reorganizing my entire shedule so I can do everything in half the time. If it would be different I would probably be extremely lazy.
And you want to remove Christmas. Just forget about it. And your extraordinary example is your pathetic life. If everybody would do like you, do you thing the world would be a better place? If everybody would be as miserable as you are, and do nothing about it, wouldn’t that be great?!
December 27, 2007 @ 1:29 PM
Well, considering how I see “family”, I’ll actually say they should ignore them at all times. And really disagree about needing the bad… And quite frankly I don’t care what you think (though it’s nice to see someone else does the same think/thing typo I usually do :p). Heh, thought you actually were from Germany…
December 27, 2007 @ 3:18 PM
Feels a bit weird writing in English sometimes when it seems to be only for the benefit of the rare random person that comes here after an odd Google search (which usually has little to do with the post it pointed them to) and to be able to give Liz (and now Sarah) links now and then instead of having to retype everything, since the few readers that do come back are all from here… Well, there’s the fact I think in English so it’s easier for me but anyway…
The only thing I want is to be with Andra again, without hurting anybody in the process and without needing to lie or cheat or scheme to make it happen. There can be no good as long as that doesn’t happen, just like all the bad will be swept aside if someday it will (not just saying it now, I know it, I’ve been there before after all).
Kinda hard for the world to be similar to one person. But yes I certainly think the world would be a far better place if everybody would put relationships first at all costs, never break a promise, care for the environment, not support consumerism, not let others rule them simply because they can’t be bothered to rule themselves and think things through over and over before acting. On the other hand it’d probably be a far worse place if they’d all be as cowardly or as shy or quite as stubborn as I am.
Not sure where the pessimism fits into this, think it depends on how you use it. I think you need pessimists when things are going well, because they see what could go wrong and can work towards preventing it from happening, and optimists when things are going badly, because they see how they could be fixed and can work towards fixing them…
December 27, 2007 @ 4:39 PM
Hmm… That’s typical too… Everybody thinks what they want to think. When I used the nick “Ascar” every girl thought I was a guy. It was fun! I said I am not home. But you liked the idea that you are speaking with someone from another country.
So you are disappointed on Christmas. Isn’t this sad! :P
I didn’t said YOU need bad things to see the good ones. You wouldn’t see something good if it was smashing on your face. But the rest of the world are limited in other ways than you. Thats another thing you’re not quite getting: the rest of the world!
And please: If I would think that I can hurt you by saying you are pathetic I wouldn’t say it. No, I don’t think you care what I say. It’s a thinking / imagining and english-speaking exercise. Do you think the world would be a better place if it was more similar to you?
December 27, 2007 @ 4:20 PM
Pretty much… And not writing this for anybody to read, it’s mainly so I can put some ideas in a… human-readable form as opposed to the jumble that’s in my head.
Certainly not writing for her to read, said once that if she would I’ll delete it. Now I know she can get here if she wants to, knows where to get the link, but didn’t so I guess she doesn’t want to. Either way, guess I won’t delete it if someday she will…
And no, you won’t find out the story from here. But I still say that when you love somebody you just do, if you can find a reason for it then that’s not love, it’s like, respect, admiration, lust, whatever, but not real love. As for why she left, found someone else and fell madly in love with him, just the kind of love I’m talking about where nothing matters…
And I want to be me, not better, not worse. The problem is that I’m too shy to be able to be myself when there’s any person I don’t already feel very close to around… But please don’t assume you know what I would or wouldn’t be willing to do for her…
Cya, have a nice day…
December 27, 2007 @ 6:51 PM
Ah… You think the world would be a better place if the world would have the same opinions as you, not the same character. Whatever opinions you have are quite useless, because you actually do nothing. Writing on a blog which nobody reads doesn’t really count.
I assume I can find out what happened to you and Andra by reading the entire blog, but I’m really never that bored. I have no idea what she liked about you, and why did she leave. Although you have some interesting ideas (which actually got me here) I doubt any girl would like to be with you. Nobody likes a wussy. I can only believe you are writing for her to read. (I did that once)… Thinking of it… i don’t think you deserve her. When you love someone, you what to be a better person for that special someone. But you wish her to come back by doing nothing for her.
Now I’m getting to far and I’m loosing track of tine. I’m gonna let you be for a while. Is a busy time of year.
December 27, 2007 @ 6:12 PM