Cav's Place

Did manage to get my new ID card last Thursday, actually getting there a few minutes early because I had misread the schedule, thinking it was between 5 PM and 6 PM instead of 5:30 PM to 6:30 PM. But several others were there before me anyway, one waving all the rest past him once things actually got going, some ten minutes later than the listed time, as he said what he had to do will take longer while ID cards, which everyone else seemed to be there for, were handed in probably less than a minute per person.
After that, I tried to do the same thing I did the last two times I had to deal with the authorities and get myself a pizza, especially since I had dad’s metro card again and had just read something about another small place which was supposed to be good and quite cheap. However, this time it didn’t work anymore, as I didn’t even get inside due to their dog, which was lying right behind the glass door and suddenly sat up and started barking at me as I moved to open it. I was even more startled because I had somehow failed to notice it until that very moment, so I immediately stood back, raised my hands and walked away. Crossed the street at the next crossing and returned on the other side, glancing towards the place when I passed by it again to see the door open and someone outside and looking in every direction, but I wasn’t about to return.
Actually, I wasn’t about to try again anywhere, as I then passed by another one of the places I was considering trying, which is in the same area, but realized I won’t be able to say a word before taking as much as a step towards the door. Did send the people from the first place a message after returning, however, to tell them they sure have a nice system to chase away potential customers and I hope nothing bad will happen to it as a result of this, but maybe they shouldn’t let it so close to the door from now on. They replied to apologize, say they hope I wasn’t too upset and assure me it won’t happen again, and also that the dog is “part of the scenery” and there’s no reason to worry that something will happen to it either, but that was pretty much it. Not sure I’d care to try again, however, though I guess it’s possible.

Then Friday came the protest, which as I said was hampered by rain. Worse, while that rain admittedly only got heavier during the actual protest, it had clearly started by 5 PM, when I got to the area. That was an hour early, but that’s an area I don’t really have any reason to go to otherwise, so I thought I’d explore for a while, also still somewhat thinking of finding some other pizza place and perhaps even ordering one while waiting for the protest to start. All I managed was to get rather lost, however, and just as I was making my way back I had to pass by a guy who had obviously lost it, sitting on the sidewalk and punching the air around a traffic sign, repeating that nobody should curse about children and the dead in a few different ways. Stared straight ahead and walked firmly past him, not turning for another glance until I was a safe distance away, and he thankfully left me alone.
But back to the rain, during the protest I also “managed” to get dad’s metro card wet when it ended up on the pavement after falling out of the small notebook I tend to keep these cards in, when I took it out of my jacket to read the song’s lyrics, which I had simply written there instead of printing. That made me worry it won’t work anymore, as these tend to be extremely sensitive to getting wet and I’ve had some of mine stop working in the past after only briefly taking them out of a pocket in the rain, but that one seemed to be fine when I got to the station. Then again, being a monthly permit, I guess that even if it gets damaged and the system won’t read it anymore, you can simply show it to a guard and be waved through as long as the date it expires on is still easily readable, but I of course preferred not to need to do that.
Either way, with everything being fine, I hopped off the metro at the next stop from mine and went to a hypermarket to grab some things while I was out anyway. That meant walking for a fair bit longer, but the rain had mostly stopped by then, so that wasn’t a problem anymore. What was odd was when I got back out and the area was almost completely deserted as I went around the stadium and through the park. Reached the back entrance of the stadium area, saw three police cars with people inside and another car coming to park there, but nobody out of a car. Then went through the gate and didn’t see any guard nor as much as a single other person in that large, wide area around the stadium until I went around and could see the other road taking me out of that area and to the park, where I noticed a woman also walking through. Nobody else on that road either, however, and again no guard at the gate. Behind the park, a man in a car and a woman coming out of it and possibly heading to her own, but then nobody else until I almost exited the park, when I saw a few people coming out of what I think is a swimming and tennis area and a few more on the last bench. In between, the stand near the back gate was closed and there was not a single other person on that main alley. Sure felt odd.

As for running, last week’s was Thursday, before going to get my new ID card, and since it was colder I was quite sure it’ll get harder to breathe later and I didn’t care to let myself breathe through the mouth again, so I pushed for records at the first two intermediate points, mainly aiming to correct that 10:01 at the bridge, which was set when the record for the full route was some two minutes slower than it is now. And I managed that, with 4:30 at the first intermediate point and 9:56 at the second, then getting slower towards the end, with the full lap being done in 16:07 and the time at the end being 20:50. Actually, the stopwatch said 20:51.02, but I was out of breath and my fingers were getting numb, so I actually looked down at it to be sure I hit the stop button after crossing what I take as the finish line, which obviously took far longer than two hundredths of a second.
This week’s run was Monday, as it was warmer and, with the exception of the wind which was still a bit too strong, the weather was nearly perfect for this. I could go wearing just a t-shirt again and maintained a completely natural pace, without trying to chase anyone else or checking the time at any spot other than the intermediate points I have set for myself. Still, I was once again slower, the total time being 20:55 and intermediate times being 4:46, 10:07 and 16:17, respectively, but what’s interesting is that not that long ago managing about 22 minutes on this route meant cramps from my chest to my feet and now I’m under 21 and it pretty much doesn’t hurt anymore. Breathing’s still the issue, as I run out of it and get lightheaded towards the end, but once I regain my breath after I stop I just walk off and it’s almost like I didn’t do much of anything. Not that it matters much when I’m about to drop at the end of the run due to that issue…
Still, the goal was 26 runs between mid-April and mid-October, to make for half the weeks of the year, and I managed 30 in 29 weeks, since there were two in one, and also already did the ten kilometer run which I planned to do no later than a year after properly starting. So that’s nice. Now idea how it’ll work from now on, however, as it’ll get harder as it gets colder and I probably will stop for the winter at some point. On the other hand, I walked past the track again yesterday and the work seemed nearly complete, so maybe I’ll be able to use that again, though it remains to be seen whether the access will continue to be free when they’ll reopen it.

And since I wrote all of that, let me also mention that Tuesday I finally received the copy of the court’s decision to reject the Gendarmerie’s appeal. A lot later than it should have arrived, but at least it’s finally here and I have more than a few words on a site to assure me that the entire mess is finally over, as this decision is final.

Once you get past the present-time part, whose sole purpose seems to be to spoil the ending, it becomes increasingly obvious that there may be a good story in here, albeit a bitterly sad one. Actually, make that a great story; a thrilling, breathtaking story, which may well exist within an interesting world and have some deeper meaning to convey as well. I’d quite like to read that story, especially if the religious aspect was mainly added for realism and the deeper meaning is mainly what’s spelled out in the last chapter. However, it seems I somehow ended up with the pile of highly detailed yet hastily written notes upon which a book, or even an entire series, is to be based. If, on the other hand, the author actually believes this to be a real book in any way worth publishing, my only advice to him is to either give away or sell the rights to someone who can actually write or hire a ghost writer to salvage something from it in his name.
Now I’m not even talking about the significant number of obvious mistakes, which reveal a lack of not only proper editing but even that of simple proofreading. I’m talking about the fact that nothing flows; nothing carries any weight or has any impact, no matter how momentous, shocking, desperate or heartbreaking the events and situations themselves may be; the dialogues seem like an endless stream of examples of how people couldn’t possibly talk; developments are rushed and strung together beyond any shred of plausible suspension of disbelief… It’s simply a pain to read and a shame, as this is a story which would deserve a better fate, if only it’d be unearthed from beneath the terrible writing.

Rating: 2/5

Notice: I do not give the author or publisher permission to use parts of this review for promotional purposes. Saying this because it’s easy to see how certain bits could be taken out of context and used as such.

Yesterday, at the invitation of a Romanian member of the European Parliament, Sorin Moisa, European Commissioner for Trade Cecilia Malmstrom attended a conference meant to support and praise TTIP. Other notable attendees were the EU’s Chief Negotiator for TTIP Ignacio Garcia Bercero and US Ambassador to the EU Anthony Luzzatto Gardner, and the conference was titled “TTIP: Romania’s Voice”. It was, as one would expect, a carefully staged affair, all speakers being in agreement with each other and highlighting only the supposedly positive aspects of the Treaty, little time being allowed for questions which may have broken the script. In addition, when those did pop up, they were dismissed with empty rhetoric, vague promises not backed by facts or data, some of them also worded in such a way as to not actually be broken if the end result will actually be as bad as those who oppose this deal expect, or even outright hostility.

Considering that, the de-click.ro platform organized an event, which I can file under the “United We Save” category since it was completely supported and promoted by both the United We Save Community and the old page, as well as by several of the known activists, some of whom also attended. Alex actually posted something of a teaser a few days before the plan was actually made public, but I have to say that for a while I wasn’t sure he was referring to the call to attend a flash mob in front of the Marriott hotel and sing a little song against TTIP, to quite literally give voice to the over 25000 Romanians who signed the European Initiative against TTIP and CETA. But that actually was the plan, the event being listed as lasting only ten minutes and the song lasting only about two, so we’d be able to do what we were there to do and get away quickly in case security will be tight and the gendarmes won’t be willing to allow us to stick around.
However, our worst enemy was in fact the weather, the rain likely keeping some from attending. The gendarmes, on the other hand, simply gathered in the area and occasionally walked past, only one asking how many will come as the dozen or so of us who were there at 6 PM decided to wait a while longer before starting, seeing as it was possible to do so. The only moment when there might have been a conflict was when we moved to the statue we had gathered in front of, to use the area as something of a stage, and one gendarme asked us to move away, saying that’s especially because we were there to be against the event which had taken place inside. The situation didn’t escalate when we stayed, however, and the one who appeared to be in charge came a few moments later to say that, as long as we’re peaceful, nothing will happen.
Of course, we were completely peaceful. A few simple instruments had been passed around to those who wanted to use more than their voices, a number of sheets of paper with the lyrics were also handed to those who hadn’t brought their own, one assumed the role of conductor, being quite amused by it, and we sang the little song a few times in the worsening rain. Once that was done, a banner was also brought and a few pictures were taken with it, both my count at the time and, after you also add those who were standing in front of the group, my own pictures saying that 20 people were present at that point. Then I left, but the video that was posted shows that some of the others stayed a little longer, to add their individual voices to the message.
Should also state that Alex seemed to simply show up at the back of the group while we were singing, and at the end said he was somewhat disappointed by how it turned out, because while we were gathering outside, he was actually inside the hotel, trying to rehearse the song by himself and wondering where everybody else was. He also said the guards and gendarmes who were inside expected us to come in and do this there, telling him they won’t allow any signs, banners or other such elements, but if we simply mean to come in, sing the little song and then get back out, they won’t stop us. It was a bit late to turn around and go in at that point, however, and it was also said that Cecilia Malmstrom had actually left the building while we were singing, some pointing at a car that passed right in front of us, meaning that being outside may have actually meant that we were seen directly, which may not have happened otherwise.

I guess I’m 31 now… And can’t say I have anything to say. It’s just another day that just happens to mark the start of yet another year since I was thrown into this world. The last one didn’t have much of a point, same as so many others before it, and so far there’s no reason to hope the next will be any different. As always, the only hope is the false one I still somehow manage to create for myself, requiring more effort every day to do so.
I guess I’ll be “celebrating” it by trying to pick up my new ID card, in case it’s ready, and needing to go alone since dad won’t be free until Monday. Should also see whether I can manage to run, before or after, and then try something else, probably after, if I won’t be too messed up. But it would sure be different and actually mean something if all of this, and in fact everything, would be done with her. As it is, it can’t have any point and I’ll feel rotten even if I’ll manage anything, possibly even worse than if I don’t… Which doesn’t give me much hope to be in any sort of decent shape and state of mind for the event planned for Friday. But that’s another story.

Since it was Friday afternoon by the time I figured out that my switch was the reason why my Internet access was so terribly slow, I had to act quickly, looking through what was available, finding one that seemed to check all boxes I was looking for and ordering it so the order will be confirmed that day, as otherwise it’ll have waited until Monday. It still said they had to order it from their supplier, with an estimate of Wednesday evening if I was to go pick it up myself or Thursday if I wanted it delivered, but I was lucky and the message I received, less than 30 minutes before closing time, said I’ll be able to pick it up Monday evening, which was exactly what I did. And yes, I actually went there myself to do that.
Still have no idea why the old one failed now, despite the fact that it was about nine and a half years old. After all, the lightning strike from 2010 burned a port, but the rest of it continued to function, then the one from 2013 didn’t seem to hurt it at all despite the LAN port on dad’s computer getting burned and the one on my old one also being somewhat damaged, as from that point on attempts to reset that chipset required hard reboots as the system would be unable to perform the command, leaving networking unusable, and then got stuck if trying to reboot normally after that, and then it once again appeared undamaged when it got wet after the cable decided to piss on my desk last year. But now, even though I’m not aware of any other such events recently and the network cable now also passes through the LAN port of my UPS, to stop any other power surges, it seems to have just had enough. And yes, I looked inside and didn’t see any obvious signs of damage, and also tried using it without the case, to eliminate the possibility of an odd short caused by something somehow ending up touching the metal casing.

But enough about that; let me move on to Wednesday, which was the last day before the temperature dropped sharply and therefore perhaps my last chance for a good long run before spring. So, despite having a bit of a cold, I ate some cereals with yogurt, went to the bathroom, blew my nose as many times a I could, got dressed, drank some tea, shoved some napkins in a pocket and went to the park. Once there, I made sure my shoelaces were tied properly, removed the upper part of my training suit and tied it on, so it ended up as something of an odd cape on top of my t-shirt, spent a couple more minutes trying to work up the courage… And then ran ten kilometers.
Had prepared for this in the sense of figuring out where I’d have to go after finishing the third lap to add the remaining 400 meters, as a lap around the lake has 3.2 kilometers, and setting target times at each of the ten points, as in the usual two intermediate points and the end of each lap, plus the finish. The overall target was one hour, aiming for 18 minutes for the first lap, 19 for the second and 20 for the third, plus three more minutes for those last 400 meters, which included climbing stairs. But, while I admittedly wasn’t feeling too well during the last lap, it actually wasn’t as hard as I thought it’ll be and the time was 54:43. Also, while I no longer remember most intermediate times exactly, I definitely remember that I beat the targets for nine out of the ten “sectors” despite actually trying to control my pace until quite shortly before the end, so I could probably improve by up to a few minutes if I really tried. The only exception was the second sector of the first lap, which admittedly had the rather ambitious target of 5:30 when a good time for it on the normal route, of 4.1 kilometers, is somewhere between 5:15 and 5:20. Either way, even there I was very consistent, managing about 5:45 the first two times and 5:40 the third, but the target for the second and third laps was six minutes.

After getting back, eating something and letting my body eliminate excess weight for the second time that day, I went out again, wanting to try to buy a cake I saw in a confectionery last Tuesday, after the whole mess with the pizza. This would also involve actually asking, so I was far from sure I’d manage, but after going to buy a few things on Monday, before and after picking up the new switch, I had managed to save the exact amount… Or at least the exact amount that was listed then, because when I got there now the price was 0.5 RON higher, so I couldn’t afford it and had to turn back. No idea whether they actually increased the price or it’s the fact that I got there close to closing time at first and they may have slightly lower prices then, so they’ll have fewer left over. I guess I’ll have to check again some other time, possibly even next week, close to 9 PM, to see how things stand.
Either way, and despite going out without my jacket and the fact that the wind was picking up even more, I didn’t come right back after that. Instead, I went exploring a little, ending up checking out three other confectioneries, one which was some distance away and two others that are nearby, which I actually just happened to notice as I was coming back. Knew that one of them should be in this area and had kept looking for it, but couldn’t remember the exact address and had pretty much given up when I noticed it, while the other is, oddly enough, very close to it. None had that type of cake, however, and doubt I could have worked up the courage to ask for it even if they did and it was cheap enough, but now I want it even more, since I’m not even sure I had it ever since I was little. May have, once or twice, but definitely no more than that and, well, I guess it’s something else done for the sake of nostalgia.

Somewhat surprisingly, I could wake up quite fine the following day. Was expecting a fair amount of pain and my cold getting noticeably worse, but it wasn’t the case. However, the cold weather is making me even more miserable than I usually am, even though I’m sitting here with a sweater on now. Can’t stand this period, with temperatures below 20°C but above 5°C or so, especially if the heat isn’t on yet either. I like winter, but by that I mean real winter, with highs around or even below freezing, lows even lower, and definitely plenty of snow. This autumn weather, chilly, cloudy, with the humidity and nagging rain, just makes me want to curl up in a ball even more and have someone wake me up when it’s over… Though in fact I’d sure want someone to wake me up when all of this, meaning everything after she left, is over and I can realize it was just a bad dream…

As for the blood mentioned in the title, well, apparently whatever issues my rear end has decided to act up again. Was sort of expecting it after Wednesday’s effort, but I ended up going twice more by the end of that day, body still striving to get rid of all excess weight, and there were no problems. Yesterday, however, I felt something tearing in the usual place and then everything was red, and it happened again today. Been a while since it was like this, and guess it’ll take some time for that to heal now, but I hope it’ll just fix itself as it always does and that it won’t take too long to do it.