Cav's Place

I happened to stumble upon the press release about a proposed Nature Relationship Index just before midnight, so I initially ended up with the most basic placeholder for a post, only including the link. But, at first glance, the idea has some merit, depending on how it’s implemented, the index is intended to evolve over time, and UNDP is asking for feedback… The problem being that it’s hard to find actual details, seeing as the paper is behind a paywall… Which is actually a serious reason for concern in itself, bad enough to make me extremely suspicious about this, at least at this early point, seeing as we’re talking about a method meant to improve conditions not just for all people, but for all life on Earth, and yet the authors published the actual proposals and the concept behind them in a place that can only be accessed by those paying utterly insane fees.
Still, I did find some details posted by one of the authors, so I’ll be commenting on that and say that, if the idea was to calculate the positive impact people can have on Nature, then I’d have wanted something that actually focuses on that, more of a Nature Restoration Index, if we’re to stick to NRI, while this idea of showing how people and Nature can coexist and thrive together while keeping Nature accessible and “used with care” runs the very high risk of turning into something like “sustainable development”, so greenwashing, because there can be no infinite growth on a finite world and we’ve passed the limits long ago already. And it’s the very fact that at the top of the proposed dimensions is accessibility, followed by use, while actual protection and restoration are at the bottom, that makes that risk seem pretty much a certainty, and by design. And, when it comes to some of the listed specifics, on top of having a hard time believing my eyes when I saw “cultural burning” listed under using Nature “with care and respect”, I have serious doubts about the role given to Indigenous communities, because those tend to be whatever shreds of past societies managed to somehow survive the onslaught of modern man, and those past societies, at their peak, also exploited and destroyed the environment, and in some cases that brought their downfall even before colonists came along, and where they didn’t, and where it may perhaps be said that at present they don’t, it’s likely because of the low numbers and reduced development, or at least reduced use of modern technology and methods, so more because they can’t than because they actually wouldn’t cause harm, and there’s no basis to say that their experience and practices would still cause little damage, not to mention actually improve the situation, if applied to modern society at large.
Not that this concept, even in this form, isn’t much better than HDI, not to mention any of the utterly harmful measurements that only focus on financial aspects, and it’s clear that an index that’d focus solely, or at least primarily, on how well countries protect and improve the environment, repairing the damage already caused and aiding other species, without looking at the benefits that people may also derive from that, is likely to generate little interest at best, and most probably a lot of backlash, people being as selfish and shortsighted as they are. But if the authors honestly intended to show what can be done in this direction, and perhaps identify places where some of those things are already being done, then that’s the path they should have taken. And, even looking at the dimensions and points listed in that article, putting safeguarding Nature first and using it last would have been an important step… And it would be the important next step, if they’re serious about the concept evolving over time.

I guess you could call this an “indirect” milestone, since the “proper” one would be the day that’d have marked a milestone if we’d have stayed together, the “proper” milestone for this year being September 27, if I’m to take that date as the end. But the 20th lonely July 12 should still count for something… And I wasn’t yet 21 when she left, so I’m approaching the point when the time spent suffering after her will be more than half of my life, though that will actually come in September of 2026, so one more July 12 will pass first… Which means that both dates will be milestones next year, if I’ll still be alive by then, since it’ll be the last July 12 before that point and the first September 27 after it. Though, of course, the truly major milestone will be that actual date.
But, to return to the present, I’m writing this with two incomplete posts remaining, in fact being untouched, the post about the half marathon still containing only the first two paragraphs and the one about the Dream Trek still skipping over the actual run. And a year ago I was in a similar situation with the post about the Dream Trek, wanting to write directly but getting to this point without managing to do so and only having a few rushed notes about the actual run. But, if I was mentioning sleeping badly back then as well, now my sleep debt is quite extreme, and I also made a lot of effort this week, wandering around on only a few hours of sleep on Tuesday and Wednesday, in terrible heat on Tuesday and carrying a whole lot on Wednesday, still getting less than seven hours of sleep per day since then, and running yesterday. So the fact that I’m not feeling well is hardly surprising, but the specific symptoms concern me, since as of last evening there’s a strange taste in my mouth, today I’ve been feeling increasingly cold even though the temperature reached about 30°C, and now I seem to start feeling something in my chest as well, and dad is bringing mother again tomorrow evening and I really wouldn’t want to pass something to her, so I’ll be taking something tonight and I’ll see how things develop.
But this is starting to look like a regular personal update and that’s not right… On the other hand, it’s not like I have anything new to say on topic, and I didn’t even find anything new while searching today. Granted, no news may be good news, and at least it means that she’s still fine, or at least fine enough to keep her position, but it’s not like my worst fear is likely to be something announced through sites that cover professional, academic or scientific activity, and it’s the personal matters that interest me, about anyone in fact. But that first kiss, which I detailed in 2007 and 2008, when I really went through pretty much everything I could remember, was around 11 PM, as far as I recall, and since there’s little else to actually say at this point, this is probably a good time to post this.

Seeing as I generally add another post in this series when I really need to post something non-personal on a certain day, it should go without saying that this one is also rushed, but at least it really deserves the title, because the included bands are actual new finds, and I actively looked for two new bands after happening to stumble upon the first one and deciding to try to stick to the same country, which in this case is Brazil, for the other two as well. Not that I didn’t check the list first, and I even found a Brazilian band with new material released within the past year and not already included in such a post, but I left it for another time… While on the other hand I removed one which had split up several years ago.

The band that I just happened to stumble upon is Enorion, but the recent release that made me click when I noticed it among the suggestions is a cover, so I won’t link to that one, going with the self-titled song and Time to Understand, which is their first one. Then again, there’s only one other original song in between, and that features Fabio Lione as vocalist, just like that recent cover, plus a lengthy instrumental bridge that sounds pretty much like what you’d expect in one of that guy’s songs and therefore not something I’m fond of. Of course, they sing power metal and seem to aim for that sort of sound, but those two songs seem to sound a fair bit better to me, even those instrumental bridges being much more appealing, especially in case of Time to Understand, so I hope they won’t focus too much on their collaboration with Fabio and lose their own direction in the process.

The second band is BrightStorm and it’s just their recent release, The Awakening, that makes them the most interesting among the three from my point of view. Admittedly, their other songs are rather different, and I’d say that even the second pick, Vampire, isn’t exactly representative, but it’s not like I usually care for such things, the picks just being songs that I prefer. Either way, while not extraordinary, the vocals are good enough and that goes for pretty much the entire package. They do seem far less confident and polished than a bad that’s apparently been around for well over a decade probably should be, and that may also mean that this is pretty much all they can do, but it is also possible that there’s still room for improvement, and their newer songs do sound better than the older ones.

As for the third band, that’s Inside Shadows, they just have three songs and the first one has some growls, so I’ll obviously go with the other two, Torn Apart and Against the Time. There are moments when the vocals do sound somewhat “broken”, but the overall sound and the instrumental parts are good enough and, even though they seem to have been around since 2019, at least in some form, they’re clearly just starting out in practical terms, so there should be plenty of room for improvement.

While I managed to write everything that comes after walking away from University Square, after the Dream Trek, I can’t just post that and leave the part about the actual run for another post, especially since July 12 is next week and it’s 2025, so I’ll need to edit this in order to add the rest at a later time, the initial form of the post skipping ahead after the first two paragraphs and the next three only being added on August 17. But now I’ll just pick up right from where I left off and say that it was a few minutes after 8 PM when I rushed out the door… And then I saw that the area around the stadium was closed because of a food festival, entrance seeming to require tickets, so I went around and jogged that part of the way… Not that I should have bothered, since it wasn’t even 8:20 PM yet when I reached the place where we were supposed to gather, which was once again that store from that mall, only a handful of people were there at the time, most showing up after that point, and Radu only started his speech at 8:43 PM, 20 minutes before the scheduled start time. And then, probably because of what happened last year, a quick warm up was done right there, and I missed it because I went to pee. But I didn’t miss the picture.
The “formal” start of the run was actually right at 9:03 PM, at sunset, and from there, since we jogged our way to the exit, making a short pause once we got outside, to wait for everyone to regroup and, I guess, to allow the organizers to make sure that everything was ready. But I didn’t know how long that pause was going to be, so I got the slip of paper and the pencil out of the running belt again, meaning to write a few more notes, but the signal to start running again was given while I was trying to do that and that bottle made it hard to get those things back in there quickly, so I struggled to do so while trying to at least walk quickly, ending up pretty much at the back of the group by the time I could run again. But that wasn’t a problem, so I still took it pretty easy, and it wasn’t long before we had to wait for quite a while at a stoplight and everyone ended up back together again anyway.
According to what we had been sent, this year we were supposed to make a detour through Morarilor Park on the way to that tram station where we always take a picture to mark the easternmost point of the route, and then turn around, get back to that park, and cross through it. However, we ended up using the “classic” version of that part of the route, without that detour and then turning left after that picture and going on Vergului, so without the detour made through that other park one and two years ago either, meaning that we only got back to what was the planned route this time around at the end of Vergului.
At least we stuck to it for a couple of hours after that, so we also ran almost a full lap around the lake in the park that I run in, albeit in the opposite direction. And, as expected, it was crowded, and while plenty of people cheered us, there were a few who openly complained, prompting a guy who was next to me to comment out loud that whenever there are running events there are people telling us to run through parks and forests and leave the streets for those who have places to go, but apparently it’s not all right even if we run not just in a park, but actually on the running lane created in it! And what made that somewhat funnier for me was that dad had this misguided belief that the Dream Trek was some sort of event that could be capitalized on, since when I mentioned that we were going to run through the park he kept repeating that those who sell things there should promote it as a way to draw customers and that they were stupid if they didn’t, completely dismissing my arguments that it’s an informal event that few who aren’t involved even know about, there are typically other events going on in that park on weekends which draw a lot of people, and runners generally bother. And he even said that he might be there around the time when we were supposed to pass through that area and have a look… And after the run he told me that he actually was, albeit in the spot where we were supposed to exit the park, but he didn’t see any large group, even if we didn’t just pass through there, but even took a short break after crossing the street, so I don’t know where he actually stood or when.
Either way, after we got moving again, we continued uneventfully along the planned route until we reached the first scheduled refreshment stop, in a location on Traian Street that I later saw is also the legal headquarters of the group that organizes this run, right at 11 PM, so ten minutes ahead of the schedule we had been e-mailed. One problem was that they had separated the food from the drinks, so while in that location we even had some chec, apparently once again made and brought by someone, plus tiny wafer pieces, small salty biscuits and pretzels, two kinds of jellies, pieces of apple, orange and banana, and high-protein pudding and yogurt, there was nothing to drink except water from a spigot that was in a corner of the yard, and while many filled bottles from there, I didn’t. And I didn’t even take a yogurt, but just a puddling, which I ate. On the other hand, since I didn’t notice that spigot at first and after it was announced that it was there the line became too long and it was too late anyway, I didn’t use it to wash my hands before eating either, so at first I took a piece of orange and one of banana, so I didn’t really have to touch the pulp, and used napkins to wipe my hands and hold a few other things, trying to touch them as little as possible. But everybody else was digging into everything anyway, so I eventually went for it as well, not getting any other pieces of banana or orange but returning multiple times for the other things that were still available. And if another serious problem was that there was no toilet in that location, I went in a nearby yard, wondering whether that building was abandoned, considering how it looked, the materials in the pretty overgrown yard and the large gap in the fence, and peed there. That led to missing the moment when light bands were handed out, but I didn’t care for those and got back in time for the group picture. And I did wash my hands after peeing.

After picking up a couple of recyclables from the underground passage, I took the metro for one stop, putting everything in a cabinet when I reached Carrefour Unirii, buying a few things, and then retrieving what I had in the cabinet and returning to the metro station, getting back here just after 7:35 AM. Then I put the purchases in their place, washed what was in the kitchen, ate a bag of chips, getting over 650 calories just from that, and left again when it was almost 9:25 AM, with the recyclables with the deposit symbol, picking up a few more from the garbage room, and some pretzels that I gave to a beggar who was in front of the metro station, since I took the metro for one stop instead of walking to that store… And that beggar was holding a message that I didn’t read, but I saw that it had a cross at the top, and when I handed him the pretzels he asked whether it was “in the name of the Lord”, so I shrugged and said “as you wish” before walking away.
When I reached that store and was initially told, by a cashier that I hadn’t seen before, that the machine had stopped working and that people keep coming with many recyclables and it can’t handle all of them, I feared that I’ll have to turn around and take them back, but then she told me to try to use it, maybe after exchanging a few words with someone else, I’m not certain, and I saw that it did work after all, and I assume that it had just been emptied, because I could put everything in without it stopping, so I just split into two, to have dad’s on one voucher and mine on another. And when I told the cashier what the total should be, including the bonus, she said that she trusted me and will just give me that amount, though she then asked whether she should trust me, having a look at the vouchers, and I did the calculation on my phone as well and showed her the result, receiving that amount.
Then I took the metro to Carrefour Pantelimon, washing my hands when I got there, entering with the few recyclables picked up on the way, and getting the year’s first watermelon, even if it was imported and more expensive than I’d have wanted, since it wasn’t large and at least it was from Greece instead of a non-EU place and still a little less than what dad tended to pay for the watermelons he got from the market, mainly for mother, even in the middle of the season in previous years. Either way, I also got a little more cat food… And then I saw that they had finally added self-checkouts that accept cash in that location as well, so I used one before arranging my things, picking up another recyclable, and deciding to test my luck by getting an instant ticket from the Lottery place that was there, though I just lost the money, not winning anything, and they had increased the price of those tickets in the two and a half years since the previous time I got one. But at least there was no bad luck on the way back, so I took the metro, I think finding another recyclable somewhere, and when I got here I saw that I had time to quickly check the nearby Mega Image as well, entering with everything, though I didn’t find anything to get.
I got back again a little after 12:05 PM… And then I bumped my head after putting the found recyclables on the balcony. But it’s not like bumping my head is unusual, which will be proven even a little later in this very post, so I then washed the watermelon, ate some of it, put it and the cat food in the fridge, made tea, did the day’s squats, went to the toilet and to wash, and then went to bed… Only to sleep for less than two hours before waking up and being unable to get back to sleep, and even the feeling of being sleepy was just going away as time passed, so I eventually gave up and got up. Then, since I needed a second post that week, I quickly played No Response and wrote the quick review while eating lunch… And just before going back to the kitchen at night I decided to lie in bed a little more… And ended up falling asleep for probably about half an hour, so it was past 1:20 AM when I woke up, and a little later I actually came back from the kitchen to get back on the computer for a little while, ending up eating dinner between 4:10 AM and 4:55 AM and getting back in bed at 5:40 AM.

At least it was past 5:20 PM when I finally got up, though I did go to pee twice before that point, also spent a little time on the computer on the first such occasion, and only actually slept for a total of about seven hours, if even that, since there was a little drilling from above just after 11:30 AM, and while it stopped quickly, after that point I had a very hard time getting back to sleep and quickly woke up whenever I finally did. Either way, I’ll also mention here that, since a discussion on the GOG.com forums had made me have another look at what was available and I finally spotted a monitor that seemed to be just what I’d want in case I ever had to replace the one that I’ve been using for some 18 and a half years, and it seemed to have the lowest price it ever had around here and the store offered an additional 10% discount on monitors those days, I decided to go for it, also adding a few accessories for the vacuum cleaner to the order and dad paying by card. And at night I ended up starting to eat dinner at 3:35 AM and it was past 4:25 AM when I finished getting what was stuck on the plate.

After having to get up much earlier than I’d have wanted, since I was scheduled to have that lost filling replaced at 2 PM, I just managed to walk out the door seconds before that hour, so I jogged, getting there pretty much right away, and I had a few minutes to wait anyway. And they did confirm that it was the same one which had also fallen in May of last year, being replaced on the 15th of that month, but I was charged for it in full anyway, the dentist saying that the shape probably makes it hard to stick in place, but she’d rather not drill more into the tooth and risk harming it when she doesn’t need to, since no new cavity developed, and she actually praised me for how well I had cleaned, saying that she basically had nothing to do except put a new one right in the hole, and that I had no other problems either, except plaque of course, but I still ignored the strong recommendation to make an appointment to have that removed. On the other hand, when I stood up I banged my head against the light, which hadn’t been moved out of the way.
The good thing was that the delivery, which was scheduled for that day, was supposed to be made later, so after having a quick look in the nearby Mega Image and picking up a few recyclables on the way back, I waited for it, rearranging my books a little during that time, since I had kept meaning to do that ever since receiving the new books, almost five months ago. And after it did arrive I obviously took the time to set up the new monitor, arranging things so the old one could stay connected as well, though I changed the settings so only the new one would be used, and then fiddling with things for a while, finding that if I used the “Economy” preset, which also means sRGB, HDR and any of the gaming enhancements except adaptive sync being off, and set the refresh rate to 60 Hz, or in fact up to 120 Hz, its power use is exactly the same as the old one’s, albeit with that one having sRGB on and a refresh rate of 75 Hz… And turning sRGB on makes this one’s power use increase massively, so I’m keeping it off. And I also keep Ambiglow off, though when I tried to leave it on while watching TV for a while, it didn’t seem to make a difference… But, speaking of differences, the difference in size and resolution will definitely take some getting used to.
On the other hand, what caught my attention even more was that, while the CPU temperature had reached a high of 61°C while processing some images or checking other games and the fan speeds continued to remain fixed, when I started Lords of Xulima, since I quickly checked how the installed games worked at this much higher resolution, and it reached 62°C, the fans suddenly sped up! I heard it, and was monitoring the system, so I saw it reported as well, and that has pretty much been the rule since, and in fact a couple of times I noticed them starting to speed up a little when the CPU was reporting a few tenths of a degree less than 62°C. So it’s not that the system can no longer react to the temperature, but that it ignores my settings and uses different ones that make it only increase the fan speed at higher temperatures, or maybe only under certain scenarios. At least that means that there should be no actual risk of overheating, but it’s definitely strange, and it remains a concern, especially when temperatures are about to go over 40°C.
Either way, it was 7:50 PM when I finally went out again, deciding to go straight to the Carrefour and Kaufland that are next to each other, despite initially meaning to either go in the other direction or at least make a detour to also check Penny. And I’d have had time for that detour, and I still had to go around the area that’s around the stadium anyway, since it was still closed even though that food festival had finished two days earlier, but I couldn’t have known any of that. So, after putting the few recyclables that I picked up on the way in a cabinet when I reached Carrefour, I got what I wanted plus two expiring products, then arranged those purchases, retrieved the recyclables, and continued to Kaufland, putting everything in a cabinet, washing my hands, and entering the store at 9 PM. But I didn’t see evening discounts that I cared for, so I only picked up a bundle of radishes in case the discount would increase, then got some other things, including some canned tomato paste that was at half price, I’m not sure why… And while I was wandering around I heard an employee say something about 11 PM and there were no closing announcements, so I waited until after 10 PM before going to the self-checkouts, and there were still no announcements. But there were no new or increased discounts either, so I left the radishes there, then retrieved my things and arranged everything just enough to be able to carry the stuff to that Mega Image, where I put the purchases in a cabinet that I locked and the recyclables in one that I didn’t, then took a packaged bread for dad and a pretzel for mother, both being discounted by 90%, and a small pack of cat food. Then I retrieved my things and went to a bench outside, taking my time to arrange everything properly. And then I remembered to check and saw that the closing time for that Kaufland was listed as 10:30 PM at the entrance, though the large sign still listed 10 PM.
I got back just before 11:15 PM, with almost 12 kg. Then I put the purchases in their place, also showed dad the new monitor, spent some time on the computer, ate a little chocolate and some watermelon, washed what was in the kitchen, waiting for dad to go to bed since he had to wake up very early but still had things to do, did the day’s squats as well, and finally went to wash at 1:40 AM. I was done at 2:15 AM, but then I noticed that one of the two remaining bananas had gone completely soft and had leaked in that basket, so I cleaned up, throwing away the paper bags that it had leaked on and washing the plastic ones a little, and also tried to see whether any of it was still usable, eating a couple of tiny bits that still had a trace of something that didn’t look completely spoiled. That meant losing a fair bit of time, so I only took a first bite of lunch at 3:15 AM, but it was quite some time later when it could be said that I actually started eating it, on and off, while working on dinner. And I also moved the olives into a jar. Either way, I finished lunch at 4:20 AM, ate dinner between 4:35 AM and 5:30 AM, and got in bed at 6:05 AM, just after dad woke up. And one annoying, and somewhat worrying, thing was that a spot on my right thumb had kept itching all day and, if anything, it seemed to be getting worse at night, though I couldn’t see anything there.

I woke up a little before 9:30 AM and decided to go to pee, and then I wanted to check something on the computer and ended up fiddling with things again, so I was still there a little after 10:20 AM, when there was some more drilling from above, and at a later point somebody rang the doorbell as well, by which point I was trying to check the route taken during the Dream Trek once it started changing and, while I’m not sure of some details, I pretty much confirmed that the different options hardly seem to make any difference at all in terms of distance, making that estimate of 45 km quite accurate either way. But checking that took quite a while, so it was 12:10 PM when I finally got back in bed… And, while it had been relatively quiet for a little while before that, more loud noises started coming from above moments later, as if heavy things were thrown or falling, my bed shaking quite noticeably a few times. That didn’t last long, but various lesser noises continued, so it took me quite some time to fall asleep again, and at 1:50 PM I was awake again, going to pee one more time and having another quick look on the computer before getting back in bed yet again and catching a few more naps, though I had been awake for quite a long time when I finally got up, a little after 4:30 PM. And then I noticed the image shifting a number of times, so I started to look through settings to see whether I could figure out what was going on and spotted something called Pixel Orbiting, which a quick search told me I correctly determined to be the culprit, but for the time being I’m leaving it on. On the other hand, at night, after making mamaliga, I saw quite a number of ants in the living room, helping themselves to the breadcrumbs scattered by dad… But now I’d consider the fact that we definitely have fleas again to be the far bigger problem.

The post about the half marathon still has only two paragraphs and today I ran and now I’m making mamaliga, so this is initially yet another placeholder, limited to the first three paragraphs, before the start of June 12th’s second run. I really can’t afford to do what I did with the first part of this post and not even add the rest about this series of runs at a later time, but for now I’m just picking up from where I left off, right after the day’s first run, when right after walking out of the park I noticed that a spot on my left foot was itching and even stinging a little at times. At that point I assumed that the shoe had rubbed me there, but it was right at the top of it, not at the back or even lower, where the inner lining of those shoes is torn or even completely gone, and later I saw bite marks in that area, so that was probably when some bug ended up there and bit me quite angrily.
Either way, I then walked to the farmers’ market, picking up a recyclable on the way and buying some apples that were worse and not even as cheap as those which I had bought from a different seller from that market the previous time I had been there, and that one had even rounded down the price while this one even set a couple of better apples from that pile aside after I asked her for all of them and apparently rounded the price up at first, because she then fussed around for a minute or so, adding a couple more apples taken from another crate and switching a few in and out of the bag while I was holding the money out to her, and when I put the bag on another seller’s scales I saw that the weight, with those apples added after she had told me the price, was exactly what I had paid for.
Then I went to that mall, washing my hands and face before drinking the shake and eating the bar which I had taken with me and then putting the apples in a cabinet from Carrefour, the problem being that the keys were gone, so I couldn’t lock it and I was going to leave them there for a while. And checking the store was just a waste of time, since I didn’t find anything to get, and what was concerning was that many of the expiring products were still only discounted by 30%. Either way, I then washed my hands again, after sifting through those expiring products, and after going back out, crossing the road and returning to the other side of the park, I sat on a bench and finally wrote the times and a few notes about the day’s first run, the problem being that I was already running late, and it was almost 8:20 PM when I started the second run. While I couldn’t check, the forecast stated that the temperature should have been 25°C, or perhaps 24-25°C, at that point, and about 23°C when I finished that run.

The problem is that, because of sector three of lap three, the time is only a rough estimate, and I’m going to go with about 52:13, though that’s probably still less than it actually was. The other sector times were 4:47, 5:22, 6:09, 4:42, 5:19, 6:22, 4:57 and 5:37, plus 2:09.96 for the final sector, making for lap times of 16:18 and 16:23 for the first two laps, but the estimate of around 6:49 for sector three of lap three, leading to about 17:23 for that lap and that total time, is largely a guess, because at the end of sector two of lap three I accidentally pressed the stop button instead of the interval one and didn’t realize it even though I had actually slowed to a walk in order to see the time better, only noticing it when I reached what I guess should be called the former ship’s dock and looked again, and while I could have turned around, walking back to the start of the sector and resuming from there, I only thought of that later, at that point just resuming the timer and deciding to go back there after finishing, to cover that portion again and add that time then. However, walking back there meant more or less resting for some ten minutes, if not even more, since I also picked up a few recyclables and left them behind something, and I started running directly instead of walking for the first couple of seconds and probably also stopped the timer just when I reached that area, so when I thought about looking again the first time around, while it had obviously taken me a couple of seconds to realize that it was stopped and resume it then. So I’ll just mention that I covered that distance in 40 seconds at that point, but I decided to add 45 seconds… Though the real time was probably more like 50 seconds, if not even more, since that’s the result if I try to determine my speed at that point, and two days later it was taking me 45-50 seconds to cover that distance.
At least it’s certain that I failed to stay under 52 minutes, which had been the initial goal and which had seemed very likely over the first two laps, sector three of lap one even just squeezing under what’d be the target for a 16-minute lap and sectors one and two of lap two being less slow than those of lap one… But then I hit the wall and everything changed, so from sector three of lap three I was just trying to limit the loss of time and hoping it’ll be enough… And until the end of sector two of lap three it might have just been, but sector three of lap three was just awful even if you take an optimistic estimate of the time into account, and the final sector was the second worst ever, only the one from last year’s second run in a day being worse, not counting the few times when I was slower when that sector was the last one of a half marathon run, and a bad one at that, since that’s quite a different thing. If it’d have been close, it’d have been really frustrating to not know which side of 52 minutes I had actually ended up on. As it is, it’s just disappointing… Though I do wonder if I didn’t slow down on those last two sectors just because I knew that I won’t be able to know whether I actually made it or not in case I gave everything and ended up close. Not that 52 minutes isn’t a bad time anyway, even for a second run in a day.
It was definitely more crowded than it had been during the day’s first run, and on the first sector I hesitated and probably briefly stopped because two cyclists were coming from the opposite direction with quite a lot of speed and also aiming for the only available space through what was otherwise a roadblock. And I once again hesitated and probably stopped for an instant on sector three of lap one, when the old woman who was about to cut me off hastened to cross the lane when I spoke up, so she really did cut me off. On the other hand, I probably didn’t quite stop on sector one of lap two, under the bridge, when I had to squeeze through, or on the following sector, when there were two moments when I hesitated. But, as I already mentioned, on sector three of lap two I hit the wall and it showed. Plus that, if I remember correctly, from that point forward there was one moment when I slowed in order to squeeze through a roadblock on each sector. And, since it was getting dark, at the end of sector two of lap three I slowed to a walk for a few seconds, wanting to make sure that I saw the first sector’s time properly and then had a good look at the second sector’s… Only to really mess things up by stopping the timer, as I already mentioned, the fact that I didn’t just do that but didn’t even realize it despite actually trying to focus on the stopwatch probably also showing just how exhausted I was. Either way, on sector three of lap three I stopped for a moment to pick up a coin, and while I’m not entirely certain, I think that it was on that same sector, maybe shortly after I looked back up after resuming the timer, when a silly dance with a cyclist ended with both of us stopping for a moment in front of each other.

After covering that part of sector three again, I walked back to the bridge, retrieved those recyclables, and made my way to Carrefour again, picking up more, along with two paper bags to carry them in, for some reason choosing one without handles the first time, even though it was actually inside one that did have handles, but at least seeing another one that had handles and seemed reasonably clean a little later and taking that as well. Then I just retrieved the apples from that cabinet, picked up a few more recyclables… And had quite a cramp just as I walked out of that mall. But I also wanted to check Kaufland and after a while I realized that I had to jog if I wanted to get there before closing time, so I tried, but only lightly and frequently finding myself slowing back to a walk. Still, it was enough, so after trying a few cabinets, finally finding one that locked, and putting my things in it, I entered the store at 9:55 PM and just took a lettuce that had a good evening discount, the closing announcement coming while I was checking the expiring products. Then I entered the digital store card’s number manually, having it on that slip of paper… And then that cabinet wouldn’t unlock, recognizing the code and sounding like it was unlocking but not actually doing so, until the employee from the information desk noticed that I kept trying and came to unlock it, so I could finally retrieve my things, and then I washed my hands again, in the room for disabled people and just with water, since there was no soap. And on the way back I kept picking up recyclables, ending up with quite a lot, and also checked those two Mega Image locations, putting my things into two cabinets, though I only locked them the second time, when I also found a 0.50 RON coin in a cabinet, and getting some bakery products, including two apple pastries, from the first one and some expiring things for dad from the second one, all being discounted by 90%.
I got back at 11:55 PM, then cleaned the litter box and went to drop a bag of trash down the chute, washed a few things in the kitchen, put the purchases, along with a few more things that dad had brought, in their place, ate a banana and an apple pastry, even did the day’s squats, and went to wash when it was almost 2 AM. I was done a few minutes after 2:30 AM, but then I wrote some quick notes about the day, so it was past 2:50 AM when I went back to the kitchen, the initial plan being to just eat the few slices of pizza brought by dad some days before as lunch and otherwise munch on the last bag of expired peanuts while working on dinner. However, I ended up deciding to add one of the baguettes with butter and garlic bought from Mega Image to that pizza, eating that lunch, on and off, between 3:30 AM and 4:30 AM, and just use part of the peanuts in the salad, leaving the rest for the evening’s match, and eventually even having some left to use in the salad made the following night. Either way, I also washed the remaining things that were in the kitchen, and ate dinner, with another one of those baguettes instead of bread, between 4:40 AM and 5:40 AM. And I got in bed at 6:40 AM, after making another tea.

Well, it took a while to fall asleep, and I was starting to get cramps in my right foot before I did, and just after 8:10 AM, after only sleeping for a short time, I woke up with some pretty serious cramps in that foot. Either way, after getting back on the computer for a little while and also rubbing cream on my feet and sipping a little tea, since it was still too hot to drink properly, I got back in bed at 8:25 AM… But I still couldn’t sleep, so a few minutes before 9 AM I drank more tea and got back on the computer, getting back in bed yet again at 9:55 AM… And still being unable to sleep. And there was some noise from above as well, including some brief cutting with power tools at one point, and then dad also got up, and that spot on my left foot was itching badly as well, and it was only in the evening when I realized that I had three bites there, and later I saw at least one more a little higher, and possibly yet another on my thigh. Either way, if I got any more sleep during that period, it was only a brief nap or two. And right at noon there was even some drilling from above, but it was brief and I had gotten back up just after 11:50 AM anyway, getting back in bed one more time at 12:40 PM. And I think that I eventually managed to catch another brief nap or two, but that didn’t add much to the total sleep time, and I had been awake for quite a while when I checked and saw that it was still several minutes before 2:30 PM. Since dad had said that he’ll be back after 3 PM, I stayed in bed, in fact only finally getting up at 3:40 PM, but I don’t think that I got any more sleep during that period. And dad only got back at 4:25 PM anyway.

After getting back in bed late in the evening and actually getting a proper nap, sleeping for about an hour and a half or so and finding that my internal clock was once again extremely accurate, since I woke up at exactly 1 AM, I had a hard time to get moving again, also talked to dad a little, and then used the worse lettuce leaves, along with a couple of better ones, to make the salad, which also included those remaining peanuts and was way too big and took way too long, so I ended up eating dinner between 4:05 AM and 4:50 AM and getting in bed at 5:20 AM. Then I got up after the alarm rang, at 2 PM, though I had been awake for a few minutes at that point, put some more medicinal alcohol and a bandage on the two bites that remained particularly noticeable and itchy, especially since they were also right at the top of the shoe, had the usual stuff, with the sweet thing being a slice of some sort of cake made by that friend of my mother’s, with added honey, and went out at 4:40 PM, wearing the full running gear and one armband and with some things in the pocket of my tights. The reported temperature was 24-25°C, holding steady.
The time was 1:23:37, with sector times of 4:35, 5:20, 6:19, 4:52, 5:28, 6:26, 4:52, 5:31, 6:34, 4:56, 5:41, 6:28, 4:47, 5:28 and 6:20, making for lap times of 16:14, 16:46, 16:57, 17:05 and 16:35. Since I felt as if I hadn’t recovered at all after the two runs from two days earlier, the only realistic goal seemed to be to stay under 1:24, the worst time over this distance, and the only time I went over 1:24, being the 1:24:06 from the first time I covered it. Not that I didn’t give a passing thought to somehow getting even under 1:22 at first, but sector three of lap one put an end to that, and from lap two I was ever more desperately trying to figure out what I needed in order to just squeeze under 1:24 and how I could possibly manage that. And when the time over the first two laps was significantly worse than that over the first two laps of the second run from two days earlier and I needed to average just under 17 minutes over the next three in order to make it, I started thinking more and more seriously of continuing to a half marathon distance, which would have allowed me to lose a few more minutes without ending up with a new worst time. But that’d have still been a failure, and five more kilometers was a daunting prospect when I was already exhausted, so I got my head down and dug in, just managing to stay under 17 minutes on lap three and then, after a sector two of lap four that was particularly concerning, pushing even harder, recovering a little of that loss over the following sector and needing “only” to match lap three’s time on lap five in order to make it. So I just gave everything, hoping it’ll be enough, actually thinking that it was after sector two, and being relieved when that proved true at the end. But it’s still the fourth worst time, with the second and third being from 2018 and after a flu and, respectively, on snow and ice and in below freezing temperatures…
Of course, the main problem was the exhaustion, but it didn’t help that, while during the first part of the run it was sunny only on some of sector two of lap one, the clouds cleared from the end of lap three, making it feel hotter, and later on there was some wind that I had to push against as well. And there were just so many of those annoying bugs; I kept running through clouds of them and they were getting everywhere. But people also caused me to lose some time, on top of the usual weaving and going the long way around. On sector two of lap one I hesitated because of a girl, while on sector three of lap three I really hesitated, or it’d probably be more accurate to say that I was startled, and possibly stopped for just an instant, because of a cyclist who was coming from the opposite direction and seemed to be heading straight towards me. Then, on sector one of lap four, I meant to more or less shove my way through a roadblock formed of people coming from the opposite direction, yet when they did open a narrow way through I found myself facing a man in a wheelchair, so I had to briefly stop and then go around him on the grass. And on sector three of lap five I slowed in order to pick my way through a group… And there was one more moment when I might have briefly stopped, on sector two of lap four, but that was because of pigeon that got startled by me and didn’t know how to get out of the way anymore.

After the run, I jogged to Carrefour, but still grabbed a recyclable on the way, hiding it under the carts before entering the store and just wasting time. Most of the discounted products were still only discounted by 30%, but there seemed to be more at half price and I did find a couple of things that I might have bought, yet I decided against it and that proved to be a good thing. Either way, I then retrieved that recyclable and, despite jogging again, grabbed a few more on the way back, along with a paper bag to carry them in.
I got back for the first time just before 7 PM, so in time for the match, and after eating a banana I initially tried to start working on lunch, which included something like a pizza, but when I realized that I had no chance to even finish making that before the end of the match, not to mention eating it as well, I just put some cheese on the two halves of that small flatbread and put it in the fridge and otherwise ate the other apple pastry that I had, did the day’s squats, and left again a few minutes after 9 PM.
Since it was so late, I jogged again, that time in the other direction, and as I went around the stadium I saw that there might have been a lot of recyclables to grab, the garbage cans being just full, apparently because there was a Jehovah’s Witnesses convention taking place there. But I was running and had no time to look, so I just grabbed two that I saw sticking up from the top of a garbage can, put them in a cabinet when I reached Carrefour, rushed in and found a few things to get, also finally using the vouchers received for previous purchases at the self-checkout. Then I retrieved those recyclables and jogged to Kaufland as well, with the purchases in one hand, putting everything in a cabinet when I got there and entering the store when it was almost 9:40 PM, seeing that the fruits and vegetables that had evening discounts were pretty much gone by then, so I just got a bundle of radishes with a great discount. Even that had probably only been left because it was incomplete, but I added two more radishes that I found scattered in the crate to it. And I also took broccoli for mother, even if it was imported, having learned that she regularly wanted some and seeing that it also had a good discount. On the other hand, I only realized when I was at the self-checkout that I had forgotten to look for the toilet paper that was supposed to be on sale those days, and the closing announcement had already been made while I used the machine, but after paying I rushed back to have a quick look, though I didn’t see any, which wasn’t surprising.
After retrieving what I had in the cabinet and arranging a little, I also went to that Mega Image, picking up one more recyclable, putting my things in a cabinet, and then waiting for the 90% discount labels to be placed on the bakery products and getting some. And by the time I did that the other products had received those discounts as well, so I took all of the packaged bread that was discounted by 90%, for my parents, and two other products that had that same discount for myself, all of that meaning that I then needed some time to arrange everything just enough to be able to walk out, and then I stopped at a bench and, after picking up another recyclable, I did a better job of arranging what I had. And then I tried to jog back as well, but the weight and the exhaustion meant that the “jogging” was in fact barely above a fast walking pace, plus that I occasionally slowed to an actual walk. And while I meant to give away at least one bakery product, I wasn’t sure that the first person that I thought might be homeless actually was, and he also had beer and cigarettes next to him anyway, while the second, despite quite clearly looking the part, had a smartphone and I think that he was on a betting site, so I moved along both times.
I got back a little after 11:15 PM, drenched in sweat. Then I put the purchases in their place, with the exception of the radishes, talked to dad a little, and it was several minutes after 12:30 AM when I went to wash, being done at 1:25 AM. Then I checked a few things on the computer, talked to dad a little more, and decided to eat the expired walnuts with Himalayan salt, getting some 850 calories just from those… Along with plenty of salt, but I had lost a lot of that, as all of the white streaks on my t-shirt showed. Either way, I also washed what was in the kitchen, including a pot and a large jar, and resumed working on that lunch, adding another base for a “pizza”, alongside that small flatbread, in the form of a cheese pie, also cut in two, and selecting what radish leaves were usable and putting them on the “pizza”, along with a can of sardines. And I also moved something into a jar and finished the tea and made another, finally eating a combined, and large, lunch and dinner, with another one of those baguettes with butter and garlic instead of bread, between 5:25 AM and 7 AM, writing notes about the day and checking stuff on-line during that time. And, after also drinking most of the new tea, it was 7:45 AM when I got in bed, feeling awfully stuffed… And while I did manage to get to sleep, between some noise from above, dad getting up, and Liza going to the litter box, around 11:20 AM I woke up, and after going to pee I got back on the computer for a while, getting back to bed just before noon and only getting up again a few minutes after 4 PM. But I have no idea how much I actually slept during that time, since I kept waking up and falling asleep again, and plenty of times I didn’t even know whether I was asleep or not.

This was rather tight, but at least I managed to finish this post before posting something else, finally editing that placeholder in order to add most of the rest of it, up to the point when I left again on the evening of June 14, in the early hours of Friday, before getting to bed in the morning, and when I woke up because dad got up I got back on the computer and wrote the remaining three paragraphs, or four if you include this one, adding those as well not long before noon, before getting back in bed.