Cav's Place

Got woken up this morning by my UPS beeping due to a power failure, and since the power didn’t return in a couple of minutes I had to turn off the computer. Did call to see whether there was any information about the failure, but the only thing the machine had was for an entirely different part of the city and I of course didn’t wait to be transferred to an operator to ask, so I just got back in bed and woke up again about one hour later, hearing the faint hum letting me know that power had been restored. It did fail again about half an hour later, but only for about one minute, so ended up getting out of bed again, not having fallen asleep again yet, but didn’t have to turn the computer off again, and it seems like it was fine after that, and I could recover some of the sleep I lost yesterday. On the other hand, quite a storm started just as I was starting to write this, at 7 PM, though it didn’t seem to cause problems after all. The threat of storm wasn’t why I didn’t go to a protest I initially intended to go to today though, since that was during the day. In truth, I was exhausted after sleeping so little yesterday and even completely forgot about it when I did wake up, though by then it was probably late anyway.

But this post won’t be about these days, but about what the title says, I guess ending with May 16, since all I have to say about that day is that there were no visits logged again, in either view, and I guess I tore a scab, possibly caused by sunburn, from this mole on my nose and there was a fair bit of blood which took a while to stop, while about May 17 there’d be a lot to write. And it’ll start with May 9, when I made the pasta I meant to have for dinner Saturday, which took a long time even for me. The fact that there was no hot water that day, or the next for that matter, didn’t help either, having to wash everything, including all the stuff left by dad in and around the sink, with cold water. Took me quite some time to clean up the mushrooms too, which looked and smelled somewhat suspicious, but I guess they were fine in the end, and I ate a whole lot of that pasta and salad that night, to do the same thing I planned to do Saturday.

Slept poorly that morning, waking up to pee three times after drinking a second tea at night, also waking when dad got back… On top of that, when I eventually got up my gum was swollen in a spot where it occasionally happens, but it usually goes down quite quickly, while then it needed a full day to more or less get back to normal. Still, had to get the race kit, so I went out at 12:50 PM, after the rain had stopped. Used the toilet in Izvor Park to wash my hands after getting there after feeling something sticky on the bar I held on to in the metro, then it was easy and didn’t take long at all to get the kit this time around, so I was back in the metro at 2 PM. However, it was I think after 6 PM when I realized that a kind of yogurt was included in the race kit and I put it in the fridge, not daring to eat it until the following week as a result, since I didn’t even know how long it had been in the bag before being given to me and I didn’t want to risk anything then.
Getting back a bit, since the rain hadn’t started again yet, I decided to check out that pizza place that I used to get pizza from before last year, since they no longer have a menu on-line, and it was a bit odd when I walked in, because I was immediately asked whether I was first from one place, the another. Can’t say I really caught the names, but I guess they could have been either reviewers or, perhaps more likely, considering how I look, some of those making deliveries. But I just said I wasn’t, then found a menu on a table and had a look, to see whether they could still be an option for Sunday, finding that their prices had increased by a lot, and also noticing that they had removed one ingredient from the pizza I would have likely been most interested in ordering if I would have ordered one after the race. Still, they’d have likely remained an option if I’d have managed to obtain the time I aimed for, but since I didn’t…
After getting back to the metro, I once again bumped into a guy I knew from protests, mainly those about Rosia Montana back in the day. Had bumped into him twice more recently, around that mall that’s close to the farmers’ market, but we just nodded at each other in passing then, yet this time we were next to each other and waiting for the train, so we started talking, with him saying that he was actually wondering whether he’ll see me again because it seemed we were bumping into each other every time he went out those days. We got off at the same stop too, so just taking the metro for one stop, but then went in different directions, though I guess he actually went in the direction I used to head in as well, until I started getting back here another way more recently, meaning that I could have continued to walk with him. But I was glad I didn’t, since I was already drenched in sweat due to this sort of interaction.
Either way, that evening I also finished the book and rushed with the quick review, posting something just before midnight and editing it after that. Had tears in my eyes because of it, though of course I still couldn’t cry, Rice writing as Lestat really feeling, as I wrote there, as perhaps the closest to a literary equivalent of returning home… And also to a time and place when… When things were different. But, then again, I was at breaking point anyway, having pushed myself like that, and dad had also decided to start some work around the apartment just that day, of course, making noise, taking piles of stuff out of the living room and placing it all over the kitchen and hallway… At first he even said “we’ll see” when I reminded him I wanted to be able to get to bed whenever I’ll want to the next day, without any noise bothering me, and didn’t want to have to squeeze myself around all that stuff that night either, but he eventually did at least get the stuff from the kitchen before I went to eat that night. However, perhaps in an attempt to get closer to finishing then, he was still doing stuff even when I finished eating, the fact that he was awake and moving around that night really getting to me, considering the state I was in already. The fact that I couldn’t shower, the hot water not returning even that night, didn’t help either.

The water was still cold when I woke up to pee at 7 AM, but at 9:10 AM, when I went again, it was warm. Obviously didn’t take a shower then, instead getting back to bed, yet continued to keep waking frequently despite not needing to pee again after that, eventually getting up at 2 PM. Did shower in the afternoon, then noticed that they had printed Lucian-Robert under my number, therefore ignoring the fact that I had written just Robert in the field for what you want to be printed there, and the organizers even completely ignored this part when they did eventually reply, after the race, to the message I sent then to ask about this and a couple of other things. Either way, tried to get some more sleep, but I think I only got about half an hour or so, though otherwise I guess I sort of meditated, counting on heartbeats and breaths, even getting to 500… Got up around 8:45 PM, started doing stuff in the kitchen, then really stuffed myself, eating 2 kg or so, and managing to finish before midnight.

After the race, when I left Constitution Square, I was thinking to just come straight back, not buy myself anything, since I didn’t deserve it. But dad had given me 30 RON for the day and there was that place I kept meaning to get something from all these years, especially after a race, so when I got to the metro station I just stood there for a while, thinking it over, then decided to not touch what I had intended to spend if I’d have managed to stay under 1:45 but spend those after all, not getting a pizza but finally getting something from there instead. So I turned away from the metro station and walked there instead, then wandered around that area, looking multiple times, taking quite some time to decide, and eventually bought three things for 20 RON. Or, more exactly, for 20.01 RON, since their prices usually end in 97, not even 99, and I gave 20.01 RON to see whether I’ll actually get 0.10 RON back, but had that coin taken but no change given, though at least the cashier stopped me to hand me the receipt.
After that, thought I sort of had a plan for the remaining 10 RON, but as I was leaving that Old Town area I noticed another pastry place with the name, and picture, of a chef that’s also known from TV shows, I think, but surprisingly low prices. Looked it up after getting back and it seems he just allows that place to use his name, possibly being a way for him to start becoming known for such things as well, his actual place, with a name that’s sort of the subtitle of that pastry place, in fact being in this mall that’s close to the farmers’ market here. But some of the things sold there looked interesting, and they were large and usually cheaper than those I had just purchased, so got two more things for 5 RON each… After waiting for the older woman who was there to pay attention, since she was writing something in a register and not caring. Not a chance of a receipt, for me or the others who also got things then, as she just gave us what we asked for and took the money, without as much as touching the cash register.
Was about to piss myself when I got to the metro at Unirii, since I hadn’t gone to the toilet again after the race, and wasn’t sure where a toilet would be there, or even if there was one, but there is a McDonald’s in that station, so went there, just barely managing to hold it long enough. Then, after getting out of the metro here, had a look at the menu of a Turkish restaurant that’s nearby as well, though I obviously had no intention of ordering anything else then, so I pretty much ignored the two waiters who came, one after the other, to ask what I wanted and stand next to me for a bit even though I was just looking through the menu placed next to the door. Still, the time spent there meant I walked back out when another one of the “old guard” activists, who’s also an important member of Demos now, was walking past.
Weighed the stuff I had bought after getting back here, seeing that it weighed just over one kilogram. I actually recall seeing exactly 1.049 kg, though that included the bags… And that was probably very similar to the weight I got rid of just before weighing the food, since as soon as I walked through the door I suddenly found myself really needing to do what I couldn’t before leaving. Then I started eating, going slowly after a while and leaving one of the things for later, since I was completely stuffed. Then I showered and that one last thing became dinner, as I didn’t eat anything else that night. Wouldn’t have felt like it even if I wouldn’t have stuffed myself like that, as after a while I was just sitting at the computer, rather stunned, not doing much of anything, hugging my knees, feeling rotten for having failed… And, of course, thinking of Andra. Even sent her an e-mail, or more exactly just sent a message to be lost into the void… Was finally in bed at 3 AM.

The following day, since my Emsisoft Anti-Malware (EAM) license was ending that evening, I finally got around to doing those tests I had been asked to do and sending the logs. Did get a reply to be told they were sent to the developers, but there was nothing else after I sent another reply, after my license had expired, to ask to be informed if something will come out of it, mainly for the sake of curiosity, though I guess EAM may become an option again in the future, if they’ll fix a lot of things. Since the support guy was otherwise so dedicated, going above and beyond when it came to what little he could actually do himself and talking about plenty of things that were not related to the product as well, this lack of another reply makes me wonder whether their system rejected that last e-mail because I no longer had a valid license when I sent it.
Either way, left around 6:45 PM, wanting to use some trips on that found metro card that was expiring the next day, which meant I had to get back late, after dad would leave, since he wasn’t using his card during the day and it’d have been quite pointless to use mine without doing something I couldn’t do otherwise. So I first went to that bigger Carrefour, getting a few things from there and also finding 1 RON on the floor, plus a couple of coins. After that, went to a park I don’t go to otherwise and explored a bit, at first just going from one end to the other of what I guess is the main alley, then sort of following a couple from a distance for a bit, since they seemed to know where they were going and I didn’t, oddly enough also spotting a 0.10 RON coin despite the fact that it was dark. When I got to another wide alley going to a major exit, I got out of the park, then kept going, being less and less certain that I was even going the right way to return to the metro station as more time passed. Spotted a metro station eventually, but that was actually the one before the one I had gotten off at, or the one after it in the direction I had gone in to get there, and I sort of figured that out right away, so I kept going at first, but after a while I turned around, crossed the road and took the metro from there, getting back here at 11:15 PM.

Still had three trips left on that metro card the next day, when it expired, so I had to use it even though dad again didn’t need his. Did have a plan, but that would have required me getting somewhere by 4 PM or so and it was too late for that when it stopped raining, so I left around 5 PM, taking out the plastic and metal and the glass bottles, then heading for that Carrefour at Obor, finding something that was discounted due to expiring soon and deciding not to go anywhere else after buying that, not wanting to carry it around. Also got some tea, and when I added it up I realized I was missing 0.01 RON to have exact change, which 0.01 RON I guess you can say was that coin I gave when I bought those first things after the half marathon. So, since I didn’t spot any coin when I looked around, I decided to get some bread as well. And then got some cabbage from that market on the way back, prices for it finally getting back to somewhat more normal levels, plus two kilograms of cheap apples. Obviously didn’t even go near those who hadn’t allowed me to pick when I tried, but did in fact let the woman selling those I did buy pick them herself, after I just had a quick look and saw that they were usually good enough.
Since I just needed one more trip to get back, I was left with one more on the card and I really wanted to offer it to someone, but nobody seemed to want it. I actually managed to get myself to hold up the card and ask whether anybody wanted a trip when I got back to that metro station, but nobody said anything, and even when I actually went to a guy who seemed to be having trouble buying one from the machines and told him directly that I had a trip he could use, he refused. Had seen him first at one machine, then he moved to another, I guess taking some time to notice the message stating that this second one was out of order, and then to a third, talking on his phone all this time, and he was still on the phone when I basically grabbed his arm and told him I had that trip. Ended up standing there awkwardly for a bit, until he finished his conversation, then asked again, but he refused, saying he had to get back as well and it’d be better to just buy one… Which I guess was an excuse due to him feeling awkward about it as well, since you can buy cards with a single trip, after all. Either way, that meant I still had that one trip when I got off the metro here, and I couldn’t get myself to ask again, so I just wrote on the back of the card that there was one trip left and it expired that day, then just placed it like that, with the writing on top, on one of the gates, actually right in front of a woman who was digging through her purse just then. No idea whether she used it or not, just left right away, not turning to look.

Since the official site doesn’t seem to list the results in this manner, or at least I couldn’t find such a listing and put it together myself, I’ll throw here the split results, as in the televote and jury points separately, for each of the three evenings. It’s rather odd, to be able to see the detailed results, including how each jury member from each country voted, and of course the total, but not this sort of split. Or at least not for anything but the jury scores in the final, since those are displayed like this during the competition itself. I’m pretty sure everything’s accurate, including when it was a matter of tiebreakers, but I’m not going to make any guarantees. It’s largely for my own use anyway, and I’m just posting the data, without commenting on it. The countries are arranged according to the position in the overall ranking.

NOTE: This post reflects the situation right after the competition, before the scores were revised.

Didn’t have high hopes after the first semifinal, but the level of the second was noticeably higher, and despite some good acts, including my top pick from the entire competition, not making it through, the final was quite nice overall, and at least two of the countries that automatically qualified definitely added to its value. There were a few good songs, a few great voices, a few acts with good show value, including one truly standing out from this point of view, and I’d say a single song I particularly disliked… Yet it ended up second. Do continue to dislike using camera tricks and overlaid images instead of actually doing something on stage for show value, yet after first making a note of the practice last year, I saw it happening again this time around.
Did check out the songs on the official channel after they were all selected, but that just means I went through them a couple of times quite some time ago, after that only listening to a couple of them some more. Again didn’t follow news or updates or look for other videos, have no idea what other songs were in the national finals and since I didn’t look at anything from rehearsals I didn’t know the potential show value of the entries. Happened to check the background story for Hatari, since they definitely stood out, and in so doing learned that they should stand out even more, but that was about it.

NOTE: This post reflects the situation right after the competition, before the scores were revised.

Netherlands winning reminds me of 2009, when I also didn’t even want the winner to make it into the final. Not that it was any different in 2016 or 2017, but 2009 was what I thought of first. Yes, I can recognize the quality of the song, but in terms of the overall impression, it wasn’t one that really stood out for me even from that point of view, and the entirely static performance caused me to drop it so low in my classification, and as I already mentioned, in fact not even include it among those I selected to qualify into the final, whether according to my classification or purely subjectively. I’d also note that it didn’t win either the televote or the jury vote, in either the final or its semifinal.
I guess Italy obtained such a good result thanks to the message and what the singer represents, but for me that didn’t mean much and the song itself was the one I actually disliked out of those in the final, and without a show value to make it stand out either, it ended up last in my classification and I stand by that assessment.
Russia had a solid performance, scoring well in every aspect, be it the song itself, the singer’s voice or the show value, yet somehow not being among the entries that stood out the most. So probably not truly suitable to win, but definitely a performance that belongs among the top few, and a whole lot better than the two above it, or the one below, if you ask me.
Switzerland being fourth is something I really have no explanations for. I considered the song to be one of the poorer ones of the final, the show value was fair but no more than that, and there was no message or some other particular reason for it to do so well, or at least none that I’m aware of.
When it comes to Norway, on the other hand, I’m pleased it ended up higher than in my classification, and that it actually won the public vote in both the final and its semifinal, each time obtaining exactly 30 points more than Netherlands. Could have been performed somewhat better and it definitely deserved a much better show value, having a great potential for this, but even so it definitely is a good and interesting song and performance and I have no idea why the juries had such a poor opinion of it. Was actually looking at the Romanian jury and how three of the five ranked Norway last during the semifinal. In the final, four ranked it between 16th and 20th, one who had ranked it higher in the semifinal changing her mind and placing it below all four others which had qualified from that semifinal and which she had placed below it then. I’m really baffled… Or, now that I looked it up, maybe not quite so much anymore, but that sort of technical problem shouldn’t have had such an impact and, either way, it still won’t explain the semifinal.

I keep thinking of changing my ranking system, giving more weight to the song, possibly even separating the song itself, in terms of composition, from how it is performed, or perhaps having one mark and modifiers for other aspects, such as show value, personal impression and maybe even voice, that can raise or lower it by up to a certain amount and are weighted in a certain way. But for now it remains the same, giving one mark for song and another for show value, plus a positive, neutral or negative modifier, and ranking first according to the overall mark that is the result of averaging the song and show ones, then according to the song mark and then, if both marks are equal, according to the modifier. In case all three are equal, the ranking is the result of me trying to quickly compare the performances in question at the end.
Once again, still largely for my own use, I’ll list all the information here, with the first number being the position in my classification, the one between parentheses that follows it being the actual position, the first number that follows the country name being the overall mark, the second being the song mark and the modifier, if not neutral, being listed at the end. All links are from the official channel, so they shouldn’t vanish.

1. (9.) Australia (7.25, 6.5, minus)
2. (3.) Russia (7, 7)
3. (23.) Israel (6.75, 7)
4. (10.) Iceland (6.75, 6.5, plus)
5. (14.) France (6.75, 6.5, plus)
6. (21.) Greece (6.75, 6.5)
7. (7.) Azerbaijan (6.75, 6.5, minus)
8. (6.) Sweden (6.5, 7)
9. (8.) North Macedonia (6.5, 7, minus)
10. (5.) Norway (6.5, 6.5, plus)
11. (19.) Estonia (6.5, 6.5)
12. (12.) Denmark (6.5, 6, minus)
13. (22.) Spain (6.5, 6, minus)
14. (17.) Serbia (6.25, 7)
15. (24.) Germany (6.25, 6.5, plus)
16. (26.) United Kingdom (6.25, 6.5, plus)
17. (13.) Slovenia (6.25, 6.5, minus)
18. (20.) San Marino (6.25, 6.5, minus)
19. (15.) Cyprus (6.25, 6)
20. (4.) Switzerland (6.25, 6)
21. (16.) Malta (6.25, 6)
22. (25.) Belarus (6.25, 6, minus)
23. (1.) The Netherlands (6, 6.5, plus)
24. (11.) Czech Republic (6, 6, minus)
25. (18.) Albania (5.75, 6)
26. (2.) Italy (5.75, 5.5)

My ranking matched the actual results for Azerbaijan and Denmark, was one place off for North Macedonia and Russia, two places off for San Marino and Sweden, and three places off for Belarus and Serbia. On the other hand, it was at least ten places off for Czech Republic, Greece, Netherlands, Switzerland and United Kingdom, and even 20 or more places off for Israel, Italy and Netherlands.

Australia truly stood out thanks to the show value. That was outstanding, and the singer’s voice was great as well, and would have been even if she wouldn’t have been singing while “flying” around like that! The problem is that the song itself didn’t impress me, and in fact in the semifinal I gave it half a point less than I eventually did in the final. Still, should have ended up higher than it did.
I already stated my opinion of Russia’s entry above, but I will add that I was actually thinking before ending up scoring Australia a bit higher than I had in the semifinal that, with Moldova out, I was likely to rank Russia first and that didn’t feel quite right, seeing as there are a few acts that stand out in some way and this isn’t really one of them. But, yes, I’d say it was the one act that made it into the final that did well from all points of view.
While I’m actually surprised that the calls for a boycott and the protests were so successful, the most notable result being that Israel received zero points from the juries, the 12 received from Belarus actually being the result of the actual votes of that jury being dismissed, I understand why this entry ended up so low. However, I just judged what I saw and heard during the competition, and this was a good song performed by a singer with an outstanding voice. I’m not saying it should have been higher, because I can definitely agree with the reasons why it was penalized so harshly, but I will say that it should have been among the top few if it’d have been any other country’s entry.
Doubt anyone can argue that Iceland didn’t truly stand out, and it’s nice to see that it at least won the televote for its semifinal. It’s too harsh to be something I’d normally listen to, but it was nevertheless the song I ended up listening to a fair bit before the competition. It’s a particularly bold entry and quite a breath of fresh air, including a fair amount of show, and definitely also shock, value. And that was my opinion even before checking out the information about them and finding that they’re anticapitalists and having another important reason to vote for them.
France was interesting, both in terms of the song itself and that of the message, and I really expected it to do much better. Admittedly, it seemed performed better the first time around, not in the final, but even so, I’m particularly surprised it wasn’t at the very least in the top ten.
Greece had a good performance overall, not particularly standing out in any way but having a good enough song, quite an interesting voice and a pretty good show value as well. I guess its problem was that, despite the singer’s somewhat unusual yet definitely very good voice, the entry doesn’t really have something to make you remember it when many others follow, and maybe it did end up a bit too high in my classification, since now I see that it’s one of the two out of my top ten that I don’t exactly care to listen to again, but it definitely should have been way higher than it was in the actual competition.
Azerbaijan had that interesting first part in terms of show value, while most of the song itself didn’t impress me, but there is a part that improved my impression. It remains one of the two songs in my top ten that I don’t exactly care to listen to again, but in terms of the overall package, I’m content with it being seventh. Interestingly, this makes it one of the two entries for which my classification matched the actual results.
Sweden had one of the better songs of the competition, but was hindered by not doing anything in particular for show value. It remains a pretty good package overall thanks to the song, and perhaps the sixth place it ended up on is fairer than the eighth it obtained in my classification, but that’s pretty much where it should be.
Despite neither sounding nor looking actually alike, North Macedonia is very similar to Sweden in the sense that it’s a nice song, with a good voice, but again not much show value, the displayed images barely making up for nothing actually happening on stage. That negative modifier is due to the fact that it, to put it mildly, reminds me of an older Romanian song, even when it comes to the words of the chorus, “spune-mi” meaning “tell me”. Interestingly, Monica Anghel was in the Romanian jury, and she ranked it first, in both the semifinal and the final.
As for Norway, I already stated that I’m pleased it ended up higher than in my classification. Maybe one of the guys didn’t quite have the voice for it, but the other made up for that, and it was a pretty good song, with an interesting sound. It’s just unfortunate that it had a great potential for a good show as well and they didn’t care too much for that, not when it comes to what actually happened on stage at least. Even considering those technical problems in the “jury final”, I definitely can’t explain why the juries had such a poor opinion of it.

To mention the semifinals as well, I did make one change in my notes, since despite still giving the usual marks I actually selected the acts I’d have wanted to go through completely subjectively, so I’ll list the differences compared to those that did actually go through from both lists here. In the first semifinal, my classification had Belgium, Georgia and Montenegro instead of Slovenia, Cyprus and Czech Republic, but while I didn’t want Cyprus and Czech Republic to qualify subjectively either, Slovenia was on that list, alongside Hungary, with Belarus, Belgium and San Marino having question marks and fighting for the last spot in that scenario, Belarus probably grabbing it, with San Marino just missing out because of Serhat’s poor performance and Belgium thrown out. As for the second, my classification had Moldova clearly on the first spot, in the entire competition in fact, and then also Croatia, Latvia and Romania instead of Albania, Malta, Netherlands and Switzerland, and the top ten in my classification also include all the eight I subjectively wanted to qualify, but when it comes to the question marks, I’d have likely ended up making one more replacement, removing Denmark and adding Lithuania, with Netherlands likely just losing that battle with Azerbaijan for the last spot because of that entirely static performance.

Did get in bed at 3 AM, but it was well after 4 AM, probably even after 4:30 AM, when I managed to fall asleep… Only to wake up at 5:10 AM to pee. I think I briefly drifted off again at some point after that, but for mere minutes if so, since I was already awake when I heard the sound the HDD makes at 11 minutes past the hour and knew the alarm, which I had to set to 6:15 AM since the start time was moved half an hour earlier this year, will soon ring. So I just waited for that to happen, then got up, ate what I meant to eat… And found that I had no Internet access. There was a message from my UPS stating that power had been restored, but nothing was logged, so any outage was too brief to be logged, but I guess it meant that the power had actually failed nearby and something had to be restarted, the symptoms being those I experience when something like this happens at night, being able to ping IPs but nothing resolving and getting no traffic otherwise. So I used dad’s computer, with the mobile Internet, to check the weather one more time, but couldn’t check whether I had a reply to a message I had sent the organizers, though there was little chance of that and I did indeed see later that they only replied quite some time after the race. Didn’t lose too much time trying to take a shit, since it was obvious that nothing was happening, and I hadn’t managed it when I tried before going to bed either.
Dad said he’ll drive me to the metro station again and the plan was to leave at 7:45 AM, but with nothing left to do, we were actually out the door a few minutes earlier, and I recall seeing 7:52 AM when I looked to see when the next train will arrive, after getting there, and it was 7:55 AM when it did. A guy who got on at Unirii and sat next to me asked me about the race, where the start was and the price of registration, asking again about the price if you register close to the start date after I first told him how much I paid to register as early as possible and seeming to think that even this highest price that had to be paid by those registering during the last two days was quite low.

Can’t quite recall when I reached Constitution Square, but quite sure it was before 8:20 AM, likely around, perhaps even a bit before, 8:15 AM. Since I knew where those offering these things used to be and found them in the same places, went straight to get a cup of water and an apple and used a part of the water to wash the apple before eating it, then wandered around some more while also eating that cereal bar with magnesium that I still had. Was specifically looking for the place where before and after pictures were to be taken, but didn’t realize where it really was, and didn’t spot anything else interesting either, so I dropped off my bag and at 8:40 AM got in line to pee, which required some five minutes of waiting.
After that, I slowly made my way to the start area, but I remembered the entrances being on the right, and many others thought so as well, or at least thought they’d be on both sides, so I walked to the spot where the entrance to sector C was supposed to be and saw that the fence just continued, the entrance actually only being on the other side. At that point, it was already 8:57 AM, and since I had to get all the way to the back of the start area in order to go around it, then make my way to the same spot on the other side, I ran, others doing the same while yet others were only then starting to look for the entrances on that wrong side. I think I didn’t quite make it to the front of the sector, the entrances being at the back, before the start, which I actually think was given some 30 seconds before 9 AM, which may explain the slightly worse start time compared to last year, and running that short distance might have had a tiny negative effect on my performance in the end. But these little things definitely weren’t what caused me not only to fail to have an official time under 1:45, which was the goal, but even to end up with more than 1:45 as real time.

The official results list my start time as 1:05.04, but my stopwatch showed 1:04.93 and I used 1:04 to calculate the time for the first kilometer. Not that all the times per kilometer weren’t somewhat rough, since the start was the only intermediate time I marked on my stopwatch, otherwise just looking at it when I was passing the signs, but I’d say I can trust them well enough, seeing as I was so close to both the actual start time and the finish time, my stopwatch saying 1:46:42 while the official time is 1:46:41.92. It’s my memory I’m not so sure about, but as far as I recall, those times per kilometer for the first 19 were 4:43, 4:48, 4:43, 4:41, 4:43, 4:54, 4:41, 4:49, 4:54, 5:00, 5:01, 4:57, 5:08, 5:21, 5:11, 5:10, 5:02, 5:08 and 5:27, followed by either 5:13 or 5:22 for the 20th and either 6:04 or 5:55 for the last 1.1 km, or I guess 6:03 or 5:54, if I take the official time and round down, as I usually do. Seeing just where the sponge and refreshment points were would help to some extent, but those aren’t displayed on the map on the site and I didn’t take a picture of the map that was in Constitution Square.
Even though the 10 km race and the half marathon started at the same time this year and I feared it’ll be extremely crowded, that was apparently only the case for those starting farther back, as I heard it took as much as 20 minutes for the last ones to get to the start line, while I didn’t have nearly as much trouble as I feared, being able to obtain that great time for the first kilometer. The second kilometer was slower due to the first short but steep climb, and the effect of the second such climb can be seen on the ninth kilometer. The fifth kilometer ended just before the first refreshment point, which led to that worse time on the sixth. That first refreshment point was also the only one where I took a piece of apple, as otherwise I got pieces of bananas, which went well except with the last one, as I actually kept that in my hand for a while and when I did eventually eat it I had some trouble keeping it down. Whether that was the one I took at the refreshment point just before the 14 km sign or that just before the 19 km one, I’m not entirely certain anymore. It was probably at that last one, but there’s also a chance I didn’t get fruit there, my mind no longer working too well at that point. Either way, I believe the sponge points were on kilometers eight, 13 and 18, but they also had water and the other drink, just no fruit, and I got both drinks every time, at each refreshment and sponge point, and never used my sponge, so I carried that in my pocket for no reason, which was also the case for the garlic. As for that gel, can say I got no actual use out of it, but did eat it on the 19th kilometer, so on that one I lost time due to both that and the refreshment point.
To get back a little, I’m quite sure of the times for the first 15 km, and was very pleased with those on the first nine. However, when I was just 30 seconds ahead of the target requiring me to maintain a pace of five minutes per kilometer from then on after ten and had already needed exactly five minutes for that tenth kilometer, things suddenly didn’t look good anymore in the least. Admittedly, there had been a refreshment point there, but when the next kilometer was even slower, albeit by a mere second, despite having no such reason to lose time, my liver had started hurting as well and I knew I’ll have to keep running against the wind until the route turned, at about 15.5 km, I knew I was in trouble. Still, with just those of us running the half marathon being left after ten kilometers and quite a large group which had been ahead of me suddenly no longer being there as a result, I had some trouble finding the right pace again and hoped things would get better after a while. Yet the 12th kilometer was only slightly faster, and that was despite really pushing and my liver getting better, and while the sponge and refreshment points were good reasons to lose time on the next two, the fact was that I had just three seconds left to lose after 14 km… And lost 11 on the 15th.
After that it was pretty much a matter of damage limitation. I did try to push again, which makes me be uncertain about the order of the next three times, since on the one hand I’m tempted to believe I started pushing right away and on the other I think I first turned, saw how close the 1:45 pacemakers were and then pushed on the 17th kilometer. If I also think of where I seem to remember being when I saw that last somewhat better time, this second scenario seems more likely, so I ordered the times according to it, but it remains an educated guess, and either way it wasn’t good enough. Do know that I was on that 17th kilometer when a guy who was just in front of me, and had been just a bit in front of me for a long time, suddenly fell, screaming and holding his ankle as we were running over the train tracks, moving from Basarabia to Decebal. It was only after I learned what had actually happened that I realized how lucky I was not to have the same thing happen to me, since I barely avoided tripping over him and was therefore looking at him when I likely stepped over that piece of track, which I didn’t notice at all.
Getting back a bit once again, it was again just about when I reached 15 km that the fact that I can’t take a shit in the morning became more of a problem than the mere added weight. It was nothing like it was back in October, but there was some pressure and more gas to deal with and I decided against eating any of the garlic, since I wasn’t sure it’d be worth the loss of time, especially after I saw how close those pacemakers were. I quite clearly should have eaten that gel then though, losing that bit of time then instead of on the 19th kilometer and perhaps actually getting some benefit from it, while eating it so late, when those pacemakers were right on my heels and it was clear I didn’t have the slightest chance of even staying in front of them, pretty much meant I wasted it. I mean, I still had a somewhat reasonable time when I pushed, if that was indeed on the 17th kilometer, and it’s possible that the actual time on the 18th was even better, considering the loss caused by that sponge point, while having two reasons to lose time on the 19th means that the time wasn’t perhaps quite as bad as it seems, but it was just as I slowed for that refreshment point that was just before the 19 km sign that the 1:45 pacemakers passed me and when I tried to push again to catch up, thinking that I might just still have a chance to stay under 1:45 as real time, I found that I simply had nothing left, and any energy boost from that gel which I had just eaten probably only came after I had already finished.
I was so exhausted that, as I stated before, I can’t even recall whether I got fruit from that last refreshment point, and then I’m quite confused about the time on the 20th kilometer, as I remember that it was 5:22 but also that I saw 1:40:38 at the end of it, which would imply that it actually was 5:13, since I’m sure I saw 1:35:25 at 19 km. Then I obviously know the time at the end, but can’t know the time for the final 1.1 km, that possible difference of nine seconds carrying over. Either way, I was feeling like I did the first time, legs burning, mind not really working anymore, people passing me on all sides and clearing away easily, sprinting for the finish line while I just fought to reach it. And I guess I looked just about as I felt too, since someone from the first aid squad stopped me for a moment just after I crossed the line, grabbing my arms and asking whether I was all right.

What I was most of all was disappointed, and kept wondering what I could have done better, and also kept thinking that my calculations did keep getting to 1:45 as real, not official, time in “race” conditions, and that I was saying that I’ll need to squeeze every last tiny bit of energy if I’m to have a chance to get under 1:45 as official time, as I meant to, the only way likely being to just make it by mere seconds and then collapse right after crossing the finish line, which I obviously didn’t do since I was still walking and breathing well enough. Did get some cramps, the first pretty bad one after taking one more of those yogurts that supposedly have a high protein content from those offering them to runners, though at the time I hadn’t even touched the one which had been included in the race kit.
Sure, if you add the time lost at refreshment points, it can get up to 1:30 or so, which would still be just shy of what’d have been needed to get under 1:45 as official time but more than enough to get there as real time, but I rather doubt I’d have maintained even this pace if I’d have ignored them. Considering how I felt at the end, I doubt they helped me too much, so there was probably a net loss of time due to making use of them, but would it have been enough to turn even that 1:45:36.88 real time into something below 1:45? I don’t know… And it wouldn’t have exactly mattered anyway, since the sector you start from is determined by the best recent official time.

Either way, I did get everything that was offered in that area for finishers, and also stood around and listened to others talking while I did so, hearing many say that it had been a particularly difficult race due to the heat. That seemed somewhat strange to me at the time, as it didn’t feel that hot, and the reported temperature was probably not even 20°C when I finished, but of course that’s measured in the shade and the Sun had obviously been quite harsh. Didn’t even notice it until I showered, quite some time after getting back, but I was quite sunburned on my arms, nose, ears and the back of my neck… And as of yesterday some of those areas actually itch a fair bit, which is rather annoying.

After finally making my way out of that area, I found the place where pictures were to be taken, but got told that I needed to have taken the “before” picture as well, they won’t just make the “after” one, so I had to give up on that. Then took that yogurt I already mentioned, got my bag, took the camera out and started wandering around, trying to get myself to ask someone to take a picture. Eventually ended up leaning on the fence, looking at those still arriving, between a couple and two guys, sort of intending to ask the woman from the couple to take that picture if and when she’ll turn, since she seemed to occasionally take pictures of the runners but was losing interest. However, when one of the guys on my other side left, I ended up talking to the other after we saw someone being taken to an ambulance, apparently after having finished, and he said that the person in question had collapsed and was full of blood on his knees, which I hadn’t noticed. That prompted me to also mention the guy who had collapsed in front of me during the race and he said he had been there as well, telling me that he had tripped over a raised piece of the tram track, which I hadn’t noticed at the time but later confirmed after my mother told me she had seen something on the news about a runner breaking his ankle in that manner. Then we pretty much confirmed that we had been pretty much in the same place then, since he said that after that point he pushed harder, managing some fast final kilometers on the way to an official time of 1:44, while I obviously slowed down. However, despite chatting like that for a little while, I still couldn’t get myself to ask him to take that picture, and then another guy came and they left together, leaving me to look around again… Until a couple fortunately asked me to take their picture, prompting me to ask them to return the favor, so that was finally done and I could leave.

Did Rice have to go where she did with this? No: Some parts about Bravenna seem out of place, some decisions and developments feel rushed and forced, and that also goes for these new beings suddenly becoming noticeable, and noticeably active, after having supposedly existed for so long. Also, not sure what to think about the fact that early on they somewhat reminded me of Rice’s Taltos, nor about the brief reference to the final books of the “old” Chronicles, which at least provides closure but feels like quite a punch, considering the fate of the characters and how offhandedly it’s all dismissed. And then there are the disagreements with some of the views presented, the modern world being called “paradise” and the love for humans and awe at their achievements, despite the squabbles, wars and different directions taken, and depicting the desire for a guiding force to direct development as wrong.
But I expected worse and yet the overall impression is much better than even the above would lead one to believe. There’s care taken to get readers up to speed, all the careful references to past books coupled with the proper use of present developments. There’s the fact that it’s all once again quite a search, for meaning, purpose, story, for both Rice’s world and the “real” one, commentary on human society, religion, life, all of it being so obvious in Kapetria’s tale, which is a novella in itself. The couple of interesting bits about Memnoch are also worth mentioning, as is the final chapter that, for the most part, makes things right. But mainly it’s that writing again, that focus on beauty and art, and love, all the detailed descriptions… Most of all, it’s simply Lestat being himself again, returned, the Brat Prince writing about his “tribe of shadows […] wrapped in Gothic splendor and self-sustained romance”, and Rice truly shining when she’s in his mind, giving voice to his thoughts. It feels like… For me, it’s perhaps the closest to a literary equivalent of returning home. Not to the place where you live, but home.

Rating: 4/5